Chapter 2
Upon reaching the hospital I couldn't stop pacing back and forth, all this suspense was weighing me down and all I wanted was for Nana to be okay. We hadn't heard anything from the doctor for over 45 minutes and the sirens in the background as well as people moving up and down only got me more worried. The neighbors have been very supportive but despite their presence here I only need to see mom, shortly after she walked in and as soon as I saw her I ran to her and threw myself in her arms... I haven't seen her for quite some time and having her here eased my pain in some kind of way. We sat in the waiting room and it was hard for us to stay calm despite the nurses repeatedly telling us to,after what seemed like 2 hours the doctor finally came out and he had this look on his face that could instantly tell you that some thing's wrong, it's not something that you'd want to hear but you have to hear it anyway... I didn't want to stay behind so I followed mom and as soon as the words came out from his mouth I fell to the ground and was in so much disbelief, I felt so paralyzed and detached from the world,, at that point everything and everyone around me became blurry, it felt like time had stopped everything was in slow motion with distinct noise in the background then suddenly I blacked out.
I don't know how it happened but when I woke up all I could see was this bright light shining from a ceiling and beeping sounds of machines that were placed on the other side of the bed, mom's hand was in mine and her face was covered in tears even though she tried to wipe them off. As soon as I saw her reality hit me and I quickly got up from the bed, ran to the door hoping to see Nana, the nurses behind me caught up with me and held me back from entering the room, I was crying as loud as I could and all I could remember were a bunch of nurses surrounding me and one of them had a needle in their hand which I suppose was meant to calm me down.
*
Been at the hospital was very chaotic and I didn't want to be there anymore, I was still in disbelief that Nana had passed away, I was with her last night how could this have happened? I got home late and she wasn't mad at me, she cooked me dinner, we were talking and laughing so how could that have led to this? How?
Debby came behind me and wrapped her arms around me and so did Richie and Keke. When it was time to put Nana to rest it was so hard to watch knowing that I'm never going to see her again, mom hugged me so tightly and she told me to let it out, to cry as much as I could. It was such a cold moment not having Nana here anymore and as much as it was to move on we just had to.
*
Days had passed and nana's memories were still fresh and will always be, I am wounded and it's going to take a long time to heal but the scar will still remain, nothing will ever be the same and it's going to be tough without her here. Mom came to sit with me and for a moment looked at me, I knew she was hurting as much as I was, she was worried about me especially now that I don't have anyone else to take care of me unless she decides to quit her job.She stayed silent for a while then held my hand and exhaled deeply, I knew at that moment she was about to say something and I wasn't prepared for it, was she going to leave me? Was she going to leave me in the care of someone else? All these thoughts kept circling my mind as I hoped for the best.
"You and I know that things have not been easy since grandma's passing,it hasn't been an easy decision but with no one to take care of you here I think it's best if you come with me to Houston"
As soon as she Said that I quickly jumped up from the couch,
"Houston? I - I can't, I can't leave everything behind"
She shook her head then got up from the couch.
"what else do you want me to do? I can't leave you here with nobody to take care of you"
"I have my friends....."
"you'll be living in their parents house? That's not possible and you know I wouldn't let that happen."
I knew this wasn't going to be an easy conversation as soon as she held my hand, moving to Houston far from my friends, school, my life is the hardest thing to do. I've worked so hard to be where I am and I'm not ready to lose my friends just to go to Houston.
"but mom you know Debby and her parents they would be totally okay if I lived with them and besides it's only for a year until I graduate"
She paced back and forth with her hands cupping her cheeks then stood right in front of me.
"Look honey I know this is not easy for you and I understand that but you've got to see my side, I can't live you here with Debby or her family or anybody else that's not family. You and grandma matter to me most and now that she's no more you're all I have and I'm afraid of losing you. I know Houston is quite far from here but it's better if you come with me, I'll enroll you into a good school, you'll have amazing friends and I'm sure Mr and Mrs park will love you. "
At this point I just needed to breath and let all this sink in, I just couldn't believe everything drastically changed in a blink of an eye, first nana's passing and now this? I've never met the park family but from the moment mom started working for them and hardly had enough time to visit I disliked them instantly. Houston is far and I don't want to be away from my friends.
I don't know how it happened but when I woke up all I could see was this bright light shining from a ceiling and beeping sounds of machines that were placed on the other side of the bed, mom's hand was in mine and her face was covered in tears even though she tried to wipe them off. As soon as I saw her reality hit me and I quickly got up from the bed, ran to the door hoping to see Nana, the nurses behind me caught up with me and held me back from entering the room, I was crying as loud as I could and all I could remember were a bunch of nurses surrounding me and one of them had a needle in their hand which I suppose was meant to calm me down.
*
Been at the hospital was very chaotic and I didn't want to be there anymore, I was still in disbelief that Nana had passed away, I was with her last night how could this have happened? I got home late and she wasn't mad at me, she cooked me dinner, we were talking and laughing so how could that have led to this? How?
Debby came behind me and wrapped her arms around me and so did Richie and Keke. When it was time to put Nana to rest it was so hard to watch knowing that I'm never going to see her again, mom hugged me so tightly and she told me to let it out, to cry as much as I could. It was such a cold moment not having Nana here anymore and as much as it was to move on we just had to.
*
Days had passed and nana's memories were still fresh and will always be, I am wounded and it's going to take a long time to heal but the scar will still remain, nothing will ever be the same and it's going to be tough without her here. Mom came to sit with me and for a moment looked at me, I knew she was hurting as much as I was, she was worried about me especially now that I don't have anyone else to take care of me unless she decides to quit her job.She stayed silent for a while then held my hand and exhaled deeply, I knew at that moment she was about to say something and I wasn't prepared for it, was she going to leave me? Was she going to leave me in the care of someone else? All these thoughts kept circling my mind as I hoped for the best.
"You and I know that things have not been easy since grandma's passing,it hasn't been an easy decision but with no one to take care of you here I think it's best if you come with me to Houston"
As soon as she Said that I quickly jumped up from the couch,
"Houston? I - I can't, I can't leave everything behind"
She shook her head then got up from the couch.
"what else do you want me to do? I can't leave you here with nobody to take care of you"
"I have my friends....."
"you'll be living in their parents house? That's not possible and you know I wouldn't let that happen."
I knew this wasn't going to be an easy conversation as soon as she held my hand, moving to Houston far from my friends, school, my life is the hardest thing to do. I've worked so hard to be where I am and I'm not ready to lose my friends just to go to Houston.
"but mom you know Debby and her parents they would be totally okay if I lived with them and besides it's only for a year until I graduate"
She paced back and forth with her hands cupping her cheeks then stood right in front of me.
"Look honey I know this is not easy for you and I understand that but you've got to see my side, I can't live you here with Debby or her family or anybody else that's not family. You and grandma matter to me most and now that she's no more you're all I have and I'm afraid of losing you. I know Houston is quite far from here but it's better if you come with me, I'll enroll you into a good school, you'll have amazing friends and I'm sure Mr and Mrs park will love you. "
At this point I just needed to breath and let all this sink in, I just couldn't believe everything drastically changed in a blink of an eye, first nana's passing and now this? I've never met the park family but from the moment mom started working for them and hardly had enough time to visit I disliked them instantly. Houston is far and I don't want to be away from my friends.
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