🌹Vivian's point of view🌹

86,400 seconds. 1,440 minutes. 24 hours. 1 day.
Since I found out.  i was still on the floor of what was supposed to be my parents room.

I was just...gone.
My mind. nor Body. didn't know how to take in this situation. My mind roming with may thoughts.

What will happen now?
where are they?
why did they leave?
Was I a burden to both of them?
Was I the wrong child to breath?
To live?
What will happen to me?

Thinking. crying. I breath in what I could but, my lungs felt as if I was breathing the words and thoughts my mind made me swallow.
I slowly got up off the floor. I was trying to be strong. but since there was no one to be strong.
not for my sister.
not for may father.
not for my mother.
But for me.
I need to be strong for myself. First I need to find a steady job to pay the bills, buy food, and have a roof over my head. but first I need to clean this house.
Clean the blood stained walls.
Clean the furniture from the dust that was starting to already form.
Clean the whole god dam house from the lies and losses and traumatic events that had once accrued.
I walked upstairs to my room and tied my hair in a pony tail.
Getting ready to clean the sinns of the walls that had been collect over the years. I started cleaning down stairs. first the kitchen. Then living room and so forth. It was hard a fuck cleaning the house. with there being a shit load of empty bottles of alcohol, some even growing bacteria within them, the many trash and food. I couldnt believe i have lived in a home this dirty and toxic. After an hour I was finish with the whole house. well the whole house except a room.
my parents room.
I walked toward the closed door. I twisted the door nob. which opened with a small creak noise that only was supposed to be in horror films. but this was not a horror film nor my imagination. which i deeply hoped it was, but this was not the case this was the reality. my reality. i flickered my eyes close. Getting mentally prepared.
inhaled.
exhale.
inhaled.
exhaled.
I started to open my eyes knowing closeing them wouldn't help me. I walked in.

i started to take off the sheets from the bed and headed the landary room. which i started to clean them. i put the sheets in a bucket filled with water and soup. leaving them to get rid of the stianed tears and pian. i walked back to parents room and started cleaning the floor. cleaned under the bed and found a receipt. me being curious I uncrumbled it and saw the date.
October 13 
my sisters death was on that day. i shook all my thoughts away and started to focus on cleaning.
I was currently cleaning the closet that once kept my parents cloths in. there are pices of wood falling. so I tried to take it off. with struggle and sweat. i pulled and pulled on the big pice of wood that was only left. My feet were on  the ground forcing and pulling the wood in the opposite direction of where it was unwanted. pulled it with all my strength and finally pulling on last time it riped. Falling on the ground with the piece of wood. I smiled at my accomplishment. that pice of wood was finally gone. I lifted my head slowly looking at the accomplishment I made, but soon the smile on my face fanished as soon as it came. I could believe my very eyes.

What the fuck was my so called "family" really hiding?