Ten
In just seventy minutes the biopsy had been completed and the incision repaired with stitches.
The power of the sedative was at its peak, and because Ryan had endured a sleepless night, the drug affected him more strongly than anticipated. Dr. Gupta encouraged Ryan to lie on the narrow bed in the prep room and rest awhile, until he felt fully alert and capable of driving.
The room was windowless. The overhead fluorescent panels were off, and only a fixture in a soffit above the small sink provided light.
The dark ceiling and shadow-hung walls inspired claustrophobia. Thoughts of caskets and the conqueror worm oppressed him, but the phobic moment quickly passed.
Relief that the procedure had gone well and exhaustion were tranquilizing. Ryan did not expect to sleep, but he slept.
To a discordant melody, he walked a dream road along a valley toward a palace high on a slope. Through the red-litten windows he could see vast forms that moved fantastically, and his heart began to pound, to boom, until it beat away that vision and harried in another.
A wild lake, bound all around with black rocks and tall pines, was lovely in its loneliness. Then the inky water rose in a series of small waves that lapped the shore where he stood, and he knew the lake was a pool of poison. Its gulf would be his grave.
Between these brief dreams and others, he half woke and always found Ismay Clemm at his bedside in the dimly lighted room, once taking his pulse, once with her hand to his forehead, sometimes just watching him, her dark face so shadowed that her oddly lit green eyes seemed to be disembodied.
A few times she spoke to him, and on the first occasion, she murmured, “You hear him, don’t you, child?”
Ryan had insufficient strength to ask of whom she spoke.
The nurse answered her own question: “Yes, you hear him.”
Later, between dreams, she said, “You must not listen, child.”
And later still: “If you hear the iron bells, you come to me.”
When he woke more than an hour after lying down, Ryan was alone.
The one light, the many shadows, and the sparely appointed prep room seemed less real to him than either the palace with windows full of red light or the black lake, or the other places in his dreams.
To confirm that he was awake and that the memory of the biopsy was real, he raised one hand to the small bandage on his neck, which covered the jugular wound, the stitches.
He rose, took off the robe, and dressed in his street clothes.
When Ryan entered the adjacent diagnostics lab, Ismay Clemm was nowhere to be seen. Dr. Gupta and the radiologist had gone, as well.
Nurse Whipset asked if he was all right.
He felt unreal, weightless and drifting, as if he were a ghost, an apparition that she mistook for flesh and blood.
Of course, she wasn’t asking if he felt emotionally sound, only if the sedative had worn off. He answered in the affirmative.
She informed him that the analysis of the biopsy specimens would be expedited. In the interest of greater accuracy and the collection of more precise information, however, Dr. Gupta had ordered the most detailed analysis; he didn’t expect to have the report until Tuesday.
Initially, Ryan intended to ask where he could find Ismay Clemm. He had wanted to ask her what she meant by the strange things she said to him during the brief periods when he had been half-awake.
Now, in the sterile brightness of the diagnostics lab, he was not certain that she had actually spoken to him. She might as easily have been merely a presence in his dreams.
The power of the sedative was at its peak, and because Ryan had endured a sleepless night, the drug affected him more strongly than anticipated. Dr. Gupta encouraged Ryan to lie on the narrow bed in the prep room and rest awhile, until he felt fully alert and capable of driving.
The room was windowless. The overhead fluorescent panels were off, and only a fixture in a soffit above the small sink provided light.
The dark ceiling and shadow-hung walls inspired claustrophobia. Thoughts of caskets and the conqueror worm oppressed him, but the phobic moment quickly passed.
Relief that the procedure had gone well and exhaustion were tranquilizing. Ryan did not expect to sleep, but he slept.
To a discordant melody, he walked a dream road along a valley toward a palace high on a slope. Through the red-litten windows he could see vast forms that moved fantastically, and his heart began to pound, to boom, until it beat away that vision and harried in another.
A wild lake, bound all around with black rocks and tall pines, was lovely in its loneliness. Then the inky water rose in a series of small waves that lapped the shore where he stood, and he knew the lake was a pool of poison. Its gulf would be his grave.
Between these brief dreams and others, he half woke and always found Ismay Clemm at his bedside in the dimly lighted room, once taking his pulse, once with her hand to his forehead, sometimes just watching him, her dark face so shadowed that her oddly lit green eyes seemed to be disembodied.
A few times she spoke to him, and on the first occasion, she murmured, “You hear him, don’t you, child?”
Ryan had insufficient strength to ask of whom she spoke.
The nurse answered her own question: “Yes, you hear him.”
Later, between dreams, she said, “You must not listen, child.”
And later still: “If you hear the iron bells, you come to me.”
When he woke more than an hour after lying down, Ryan was alone.
The one light, the many shadows, and the sparely appointed prep room seemed less real to him than either the palace with windows full of red light or the black lake, or the other places in his dreams.
To confirm that he was awake and that the memory of the biopsy was real, he raised one hand to the small bandage on his neck, which covered the jugular wound, the stitches.
He rose, took off the robe, and dressed in his street clothes.
When Ryan entered the adjacent diagnostics lab, Ismay Clemm was nowhere to be seen. Dr. Gupta and the radiologist had gone, as well.
Nurse Whipset asked if he was all right.
He felt unreal, weightless and drifting, as if he were a ghost, an apparition that she mistook for flesh and blood.
Of course, she wasn’t asking if he felt emotionally sound, only if the sedative had worn off. He answered in the affirmative.
She informed him that the analysis of the biopsy specimens would be expedited. In the interest of greater accuracy and the collection of more precise information, however, Dr. Gupta had ordered the most detailed analysis; he didn’t expect to have the report until Tuesday.
Initially, Ryan intended to ask where he could find Ismay Clemm. He had wanted to ask her what she meant by the strange things she said to him during the brief periods when he had been half-awake.
Now, in the sterile brightness of the diagnostics lab, he was not certain that she had actually spoken to him. She might as easily have been merely a presence in his dreams.
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