2nd September 20XX, RL

It was the first day back at senior school. There were no lessons, but being absent from class would have required an extremely good excuse.

As usual, I sat at the desk by the window, in the same place where I had sat in year nine. There were about fifteen minutes to go before assembly. Almost everyone had arrived and divided up into smaller groups, noisily sharing their summer experiences. I took out a book. Printed books were a rarity, and a relic from the past, but nothing gave me such a sense of peace as the smell of a book – the slightly acidic and warm aroma of paper and dust, like the scent of a warm midday in autumn.

In the middle of the second paragraph, I was distracted by a girl’s deafening shriek:

“Angie, I’ve missed you so much!”

“That’s quite a beach tan! But you said that you were going skiing with your family.”

“Aha, it’s such fun, you know! Skiing in the middle of summer! Actually, we went skiing and then decided to go to the seaside afterwards. And then I spent three days shopping with my sister. If you come to my house, I can show you all my foreign gear. I’ve got a couple of little presents for you as well.”

“While we’re on the subject of presents, congratulations! It was your birthday yesterday!”

“Happy birthday from me, too!”

Almost all of the class crowded around a small, tanned blonde girl. Angela was one of the informal leaders, and a local ‘star’. She was noisy, and of average academic ability, but she was always surrounded by friends and admirers. The whole school knew her. She was on the student council, where she was responsible for organising school events such as parties and celebrations.

“Happy birthday to you! Are you going to celebrate with your classmates?”

“Oh, guys, I only came back to town yesterday evening, so there wasn’t any time to do anything before my birthday.”

I would have loved to be able to talk to people so easily. I could even imagine myself getting up, walking over, and smiling – it would be hard not to respond to a smile as expressive as Angie’s. I lacked the courage to congratulate her on my own, but I was quite capable of joining in the chorus of voices with another ‘Happy birthday!’

“Let’s go to a pizzeria at the weekend, and we can celebrate the beginning of the school year at the same time!”

“That’s a good idea!”

I didn’t budge an inch. Not a single muscle moved on my face.

After all, who needs my pathetic congratulations?

“By the way, I heard that a new girl’s coming. I hope she’s nice.”

“She’s already been put into the parallel class. So there’s no point wondering.”

“I don’t see a problem with that.”

“On the subject of newbies, girls, we’re getting a new teacher! Lana in class eleven has already seen him and says he’s young and good-looking.”

“You’re always going after older guys. You eye up students and young teachers, leaving your classmates deprived of female attention.”

“A fellow sufferer…”

I will probably never understand the people around me, with their empty chatter, jokes, teasing and flirting… The world in which I lived was much more complex and refined.

Or at least I wanted to believe it was.

***

3rd September 20XX, RL

The bell rang. The hour-long break in the middle the school day was that blessed time when I could get away from my classmates.

I put my tablet into my bag and headed for the canteen. I preferred not to leave my belongings in the classroom.

After buying the recommended lunch, I sat at the long counter which stretched out along the length of a panoramic window. This was the place for loners like me. From there you could see the courtyard. Three storeys below, the social lives of my peers played out in a space that seemed to be the size of my palm, but today I wasn’t interested in playing the observer. I took a book out of my bag and opened it at the bookmarked page.

“I’m sorry, Alex. Our group have decided to have a celebratory lunch for the beginning of the new school year, so I won’t be able to keep you company today.”

I shuddered as I heard voices from directly behind me.

“Don’t apologise, as if I can’t eat on my own. Go and enjoy yourself. Just don’t forget about your next lesson.”

“Okay. Well, I’ve got to run.”

Someone put a tray on the counter next to me.

“Is this seat free?”

I glanced to my right and met a clear, direct gaze, so I immediately muttered self-effacingly:

“Sure.”

“Am I disturbing you? There aren’t any other free chairs, but I could take this one somewhere else,” the girl said with a wide smile. She probably smiled like that when she was talking to her best friend, too.

“I don’t mind,” I replied, turning a page to give the impression that I was busy reading and wasn’t at all bothered where she ate her lunch. I hadn’t even read the page.

What an idiot, I thought, reproaching myself. Now you’ll have to wait for her to finish her lunch before you can turn back.

I cautiously peered at my unexpected neighbour. To be honest I had always found myself stuck when trying to assess someone else’s attractiveness. How was it possible to rank the people around me without any clear parameters for judging beauty?

The girl next to me had regular facial features, grey eyes, and long eyelashes. Her black hair came down to her shoulders, and her straight fringe almost covered her eyebrows. She was wearing hardly any make-up. I suppose she could be classed as nice.

“I didn’t know that the computer system recommends meals in your school.”

“Yes, it takes into account the state of your health, calories burned, current workload, and schedule. The information is taken from your ID. But it’s difficult to say how individualised it is. Up to five types of lunch are prepared every day. You don’t have to choose the recommended one, by the way.”

“Great. I’m not in the database yet, so I just took something at random.”

There was something bewitching about the way she tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, lowering her head and closing her eyes at the same time. I also noticed that there were five earrings in her left ear.

“What are you reading?” she asked, leaning slightly towards me as she tried to look at the cover.

I began to feel hot. My palms were sweating but conversely my mouth had become dry. I regretted letting her sit next to me. If a stranger came this close to me, my heart rate immediately increased.

“Hyperion? I’ve read that, too. It’s my brother’s favourite book. Do you borrow books from a library?”

“No, my grandfather collected books.”

If this went on for much longer, my lunch would be spoiled for the sake of keeping the conversation going.

She turned away and began to unpack the boxes of food.

“In our family, paper books have always been a luxury. Not because of the price, but because of the extra luggage when we moved about.”

She stopped smiling and watched me attentively.

Is there something wrong with my face?

“Well, I won’t interrupt you.”

This abrupt change left me slightly bewildered.

She didn’t utter another word. After eating her lunch in silence, she stood up with her tray.

“Bye, then.”

***

Then, at the next break time…

“Hey, four-eyes!”

I’m popular today.

“Apparently you were seen with the new girl in the canteen,” one of my classmates said, walking towards me.

Vitaly was half a head taller than me and could boast some well-toned muscles. He was in the Taekwondo team and mixed with the kind of people whom I preferred to avoid.

“The new girl? I didn’t even realise it was her,” I replied without looking up.

What should I do? Perhaps if I look at my book and not at him, he won’t be encouraged to go on.

“She just sat down next to me because there weren’t any other chairs free.”

“Really? They say that you were chatting about something with her.”

“She asked me what I was reading. That’s all. We didn’t talk about anything else.”

“Good. She realised that you read weird old stuff, so there was no point talking to you.”

You’ve probably only ever read a book and half in your entire life.

“Redhead, don’t lay a finger on him!”

Matvey, the prefect, was the only person whom the antisocial elements in our class ever obeyed without question.

“Well, you get the idea, Four-Eyes. Steer clear.”

Vitaly thrust his hands into his trouser pockets and shuffled back over to his desk.

At that moment I physically sensed that my carefully constructed school relationships had been shaken.