The engine went off and your bodies moved to a row. You got out of the car one by one, slowly, as if you didn't want to believe it, as if you were afraid to see where you had arrived, where you might live. A gate rose in front of you, huge and solid, enriched with rust stains. Out of this deep and cold silence came distant sounds, voices. Laughter. That was laughing from children. Rick looked back and watched each of you. He now believed in this place. Aaron approached the gate and called someone named Nicholas. As soon as he appeared behind the metal bars, suddenly an opossum ran between your legs and Daryl immediately shot it with an arrow. The guard opened the gate and looked at you confused. It must be strange to see people like you... The archer grabbed the animal and swung it back and forth.

"We brought Dinner.", he said.

You smiled at Nicholas and tried to stay calm. You were afraid you wouldn't pass the test that would soon throw you back on the road. You sincerely hoped that the most unpredictable people behaved well, like Daryl and Abraham. Aaron motioned for you to follow him and entered the community. You looked around and were ready to capture every meticulous detail as if everything was useful to you. The gate closed behind you, and you were trapped in this new area.

"Before you go on, you have to give us the weapons, if you want to stay...", Nicholas informed, but Rick immediately contradicted.

This time, you wouldn't have learned about the sheriff's decisions unless they were completely wrong or premature. You didn't want to be more hostile to the group.

"We don't know yet if we want to stay."

Aaron understood the situation and calmed his friend. He did not seem very convinced, but didn't insist.

"Let's talk to Deanna first.", he told Aaron.

"Who is Deanna?", you asked curiously.

"She's the one who knows everything you want to know about this place.", Aaron replied: "Rick, do you want to go first?"

The sheriff turned around to understand your intentions, whether it was good or not. Then he focused on something far away, slightly behind Sasha. He suddenly whirled around and took his revolver. He aimed and killed a walker in the immediate vicinity.

"That we arrived.", Rick said, now moving forward.

As a first approximation, you weren't very friendly, but you hoped that the members of this community could understand and accept it. It would have been very difficult to settle down. Nicholas accompanied Rick to the woman and Aaron showed you two houses. The private driveway, the hardened grass, the perfect plaster. They appeared as if they had just come from a catalog. It was as if this piece of the world had never been contaminated by the destruction. Besides, they reminded you of those days...

"They belong to you, there's everything you need inside, organize yourself as you see fit.", he told you.

Nicholas would come back and get one of you. Deanna had expressed the will to get to know each other bit by bit. Michonne and Maggie looked at each other enthusiastically and crossed the threshold first. Everyone followed and separated randomly between the two structures. Only Daryl and you stood outside looking at the drywall.

"Can you belive that?"

"I don't know.", he snorted: "The whole shit stinks."

You took a quick look around the neighborhood. It was so bright, colorful, alive. The flowers adorned the paths, the trees were full of fruit. The windows had no dust layer. A lady even went for a walk with a dog.

"What stinks here is you, Dixon."

You entered the house on the left. It was a shock. The rooms were perfectly decorated, luxurious and clean. You haven't seen anything like that in years and couldn't understand it. The kitchen was immense, with a two-door refrigerator and an ice dispenser. From the tap dripping transparent, drinking water. On the walls there were squares, empty frames that you could fill with your memories and various paintings. In short, absolutely nothing was missing... Whatever you could have imagined, even the most trivial, there it was. You now climbed the stairs, curious to see the rest. The rooms were of indescribable comfort. Pillows, sheets and soft and fresh scented blankets. Then you went to the bathroom, eager to look at the shower. From that moment Michonne came out with a toothbrush in her hand. She vigorously brushed her teeth to account for the months of abstinence from this type of hygiene. With her mouth full she pointed to the sink. On it were various packs with a variety of toothbrushes. She smiled and spilled some toothpaste on the tank top but did not care, her eyes were so bright, she was happy. She was really happy... You accidentally opened a box and found yourself with a white and purple brush with blue and white bristles of various sizes. You smeared more toothpaste than necessary and started rubbing it on your teeth as you wanted to feel the freshness of fluoride and mint. You laughed and looked in the mirror, you looked like two little girls struggling at a pajama party. Then Carl shouted loudly Michonne's name and waved something in his hands. She spat in the sink and joined him in a chamber from the attic. It would probably be his room and you were sure that he had found some comic books. You rinsed your mouth, put the cap back on the toothbrush, opened the bathroom window, and looked out. The view was breathtaking. Many houses next to each other. Many families in safety. Green areas, a church, walls and watchtowers. There was really nothing missing. You then saw a woman approaching your house with a box full of weapons while Aaron walked up to her. It was probably time to hand over your gear. They hoped that you would have more confidence in them if you had looked at the place. You ran down the stairs and went out onto the street, back to the group. The woman pointed to the box and told you to put your weapons in it.

"Do not worry, it's still your weapons, you can take them when you want, but not right now, I'll just bring them to our storeroom."

You wanted to wait for someone to take the first step, but apparently nobody seemed to really believe it. So you were the first of you to get rid of the backpack and the equipment, including the weapon in your holster. You put everything in the box and then went back with a fake smile, as if it did not bother you at all. In fact, you hated to be so unarmed. You never realized how much security these weapons actually gave you. At the moment you felt deprived of your safety. After you Michonne also put the Katana on it. On the contrary, she seemed very satisfied. The last person to put down her weapons was Carol, who played the role of the weak and incompetent woman. She took the weapon from her shoulders and made the object look heavier than it was. The woman from the warehouse couldn't hold back a smile. She was sorry for her... Carol had already assumed the role of the perfect housewife, already thinking about what to say and do to win the residents' trust. Sneaky and smart. Aaron ran a hand through his hair. He was a bit embarrassed and didn't know how to identify with you given the delicacy of the situation.

"Inquire, look around, inspect. I'm sure it will all be to your liking."

Maggie and Glenn now walked down the main street to watch the various houses and structures. Michonne returned home. She would take a shower. Carol pretended to be arbitrary, but you knew she followed the same path as the woman who went the warehouse. Daryl sat down beside the fence, with the oppossum. Instead, Abraham's group returned to the house with the intention of waiting for Deanna until it was their turn. You looked around a bit, doubtful of what to do. Suddenly Aaron came to you. "Do you like the house?"

"Are you really asking me that?", you joked: "This place is really fantastic, Aaron!"

"From now on you will live here.", he commented.

"Well, I hope so, but you have to understand that you were far from everything, you did not have to be confronted with anything that happened to us, or just with what's out there...", you said looked at the gates: "I think you're still one of the happiest people on this earth left."

He laughed a little and looked at you seriously. He knew how much you were right, but it was hard to imagine how many atrocities they had avoided.

"Thanks anyway."

He put a hand on my shoulder and smiled at you: "You don't have to thank me."

"That's not true.", you replied: "Thank you for believing in us, for bringing us into your fellowship. We will not disappoint you."

Meanwhile, Daryl spat on the floor. Pointing out how much he hated this situation. You saw Aaron make a strange grimace and retreat with a fake smile. You turned to despair and saw Daryl skin the animal. He opened it in half and pulled out the intestines. Hands and mouth were full of blood.

"What?", he mumbled, feeling watched.

"Do you even ever think about what you're doing?", you asked perplexed: "We should make a good impression. Not all people here know how to survive out there, you can not eat like an animal in front of anyone."

He ignored your words and chewed on another bite.

"I don't give a fuck.", he murmured: "Ain't wanna waste it."

You snorted: "Then at least take a shower."

"Why the hell should I?", he asked, digging his fingers into the opossum's belly.

You lowered yourself and leaned forward to get eye contact with him: "They have soap, they have hot water, they have a damn toilet with toilet paper. Don't you realize that, or do I have to explain it to you?", you said.

"What for?", he grumbled: "To make a good impression?"

He violently tugged at other entrails and ate them eagerly. You didn't understand if he was just nervous or angry for a reason.

"If you don't want to do it for yourself, at least do it for us. For Judith, for Carl.", you said with discomfort: "For me."

He looked at you out of the corner of his eye and added nothing, just licking his bloody fingers. You then went down the driveway and looked around. You didn't meet people, everyone was in their homes to peer out from behind the curtains. But you didn't regret it, you preferred to be undisturbed, exploring the place without being overwhelmed by people, questions and explanations. You now faced the metal wall that separated you from the outside and didn't hear any particular noise. Later, you saw an empty sentry post, so you climbed the stairs and watched the nature around the community. The sun illuminated the surroundings, nourished the plants and overheated the asphalt of the road, creating typical visual games. A walker stumbled over his own legs, staggering around with his open jaw. He seemed weak and hungry and you wondered if any of these creatures could ever really get in here. Was Alexandria really safe? You were hoping that the conversation between Deanna and Rick would be successful. The sheriff had to trust people again, it would be a long and exhausting journey, but you knew that sooner or later he would be victorious. You stood and stared aimlessly at this walker, watching him with an empty and indifferent look so that you jumped a little when you heard a voice behind you.

"Now don't tell me you're missing those things."

You turned around immediately, shocked that you hadn't heard anyone come. A tall man with a touch of sketchy beard. A sniper rifle in his hands and a sparkling smile. You walked away, as if to give him the place, but he reached out his hand.

"I'm Spencer. You have to be part of the new group Aaron told me about.", he said, while you squeezed his hand and forced a smile. It was still a strange effect to see clean and ordinary people without anger or fear in their eyes.

"I am Y/N..."

He walked to the wall and leaned over a little: "Those things...", he said, staring at the walker ​​you had targeted yourself: "I only see them on expeditions around here. I just can't imagine what it's like living out there all the time."

He seemed to be calm and relaxed. In its place you would have had a watchful eye. Of course, you were unarmed and he had a gun. You were certainly harmless, but you would never have surrounded yourself with such spontaneous calm. He probably trusted Aaron's judgment, or you didn't look like a dangerous woman to be on guard about.

"It is anything but pleasant."

He sighed and continued to stare at the walker: "Well, we'll probably have a party tonight to greet you. Not big, just some music and beer. You know, to meet you, to get to know you."

You were stunned, surprised and he looked at you with a wrinkled forehead. "Did I say something wrong?"

"No. Excuse me. That's all...", you said gesticulating: "It's all new to us. You're talking about a party, about music, about people who are willing to learn more about us and this life out there... As if it were normal, as if everything stayed as it once was. I'm just incredulous."

He scratched his neck and assumed an embarrassed expression. "Okay.", he exclaimed: "Maybe I was not careful enough and I'm sorry. I didn't think about it. You do not have to appear, in short, it's just an invitation, you can do what you whatever you want, but we will come over later, me or Aaron, to inform you."

"You don't have to apologize, I'm just confused by this new atmosphere. I don't know if any of them will come from my group, but I hope everybody wants to settle here."

You exchanged a smile and the silence fell between you. It had never bothered you not to talk to anyone, but at that moment you felt the embarrassment in your veins. It was probably the enormous difficulty of achieving what you were catapulted into.

"Anyway, I have to go now... I'd like to have a shower before I meet Deanna."

Obviously, he understood your need and dismissed you without too much useless chatter. You quickly went in the direction of what would have been your house from now on. You felt a strange sensation, a perverted sense of discomfort. You were glad to have met another member of the community, but everything seemed so strange and blurry in your eyes. There was too much kindness in the air, for example, Spencer had not shied away from seeing you in this pathetic state. Suddenly, you began to doubt this place without knowing the exact reason. You only hoped that the unhealthy doubt you had hinted might disappear when you arrived. At the door you saw Carol standing at the end of the street and she gave you an annoyed look. Nobody had come back yet, and Michonne had to be gone from the moment you heard no sound from the bathroom. You crossed the living room as if you were tired, defeated by these thorny situations, stopped in front of the window and looked at the garden. This vision just reminded you of your past... It would have been hard to live with the group. Not that you hadn't already done that, but now things had suddenly taken another turn. You had always known that some of them were still resentful of you, although you were always available and ready for anything, but since you tried the water, it was different. In your heart, you knew that you shouldn't have done it, nor would you try to get them to change their minds with falsehoods, because you would never have given up being yourself. Suddenly you heard the door squeal and turned in that direction, hoping it was not Carol. Luckily for you, you crossed those cold and profound eyes.

"Hey.", Rick greeted you and closed the door behind him: "The others are still with Deanna?"

You nodded and looked back at the perfectly maintained and immaculate garden.

"Haven't you been there yet?", he asked, coming up to you and looking out of the window as well.

"I just got home.", you smiled: "I exchanged a few words with a man. He looked like a good guy, but I wanted to take a shower before talking to Deanna."

His face wasn't yet completely relaxed or painless. He still had serious doubts about the community.

"After all, Deanna made a good impression...", he said seriously, staring at the grass.

"But?"

He frowned: "But everyone seems to me to be sure of the impenetrability of this place."

You did not answer.

"What do you think about that?", he finally asked after a few minutes of silence: "From this place and from these people."

You put your hands in your pockets. "Why are you asking me this?"

He looked at you with a question mark on his face. "Because I'm interested in your opinion.", he replied as if it were obvious.

"Not lately...", you said awkwardly and weren't sure what to say.

He crossed his arms over his chest and emphasized his muscles: "Just explain yourself..."

You wanted to go, you had regretted to say what you thought, but he grabbed your arm, if only gently.

"Let's talk. Tell me what's wrong.", he said, pulling you towards him.

"I think that a good part of our group, if not all, have reservations about me."

He shook his head and smiled at you. "That's not right, I know what you're talking about, but you do not have to listen to Abraham or Carol. You should know what kind of character you have."

You already knew that, but it wasn't that easy.

"What about you?", you asked, turning back with your eyes to the garden to avoid his gaze. He was surprised by the question. He remained silent for a few seconds, lost in thought, as if he were tracing all your discussions. Then he slowly moved to your shoulders.

"I trust you blindly.", he said, hugging you from behind: "And if I get angry sometimes, it's because you're putting yourself in trouble and I do not want something to happen to you. You know... I think Daryl thinks that way too, he doesn't want to lose you and he would do anything for you..."

You were petrified by this innocent and yet very desirable contact. Your heart started to twitch and throbbed fearlessly in your chest. Were you really so desperate that you were so eager for a simple hug? This little union of you reassured you more than fond words, that you did not even realized what he had said about Daryl. You returned that gesture and gently stroked his arms, which wrapped around you like a blanket. You closed your eyes as if you didn't want to lose the feeling of peace on your skin. Nevertheless, you both knew something was wrong, and Rick knew it first. You melt fast like satin, but with a strange softness in the gesture.

"I'll need a shower with hot water too. I think I'll try it in the next house.", he said sheepishly, heading for the stairs, taking a few steps down, and you remembered Spencer's invitation.

"Rick?", you called and he stopped with the handle of the door in his hands: "I almost forgot about it, the man said that maybe tonight there will be a party, in short, a quiet evening to meet, maybe Deanna has already talked about it..."

He looked down, almost disappointed, and replied: "Just a hint, but they wanted to let us know.", he said softly: "But thanks for reminding me."

The door closed and you stood there like a statue, motionless to see him go, as you remembered what he had just said about the archer. You felt a contrasting feeling in yourself, it was as if you were doing something wrong, as if you lacked a fundamental factor.

"Fuck it...", you mumbled to yourself, because you didn't have time for this nonsense. You had to stop thinking about every tiny thing, because it ended up with just tormenting yourself. You slammed the bathroom door shut and let the shower water flow until it was almost too hot. You quickly undressed, eager to immerse yourself in this enveloping warmth. In front of you, a wall mirror reflected your picture in its entirety. Your body was emaciated and wounded, so you approached slowly and saw a scar or a fresh wound with each step. The ribs peeked out slightly... You ran your fingers carefully over each bone and took everything bitterly true. The wound in your leg was awful, half-scarred, leaving a ten-centimeter long scar on your thigh. The pain had never quite disappeared, but you had decided to hide it. You simulated a normal gait, hadn't said anything about it and everyone seemed to have eaten the bait. Of course you never had a great self-esteem of yourself as a person in general and of your whole body, but now you were ashamed of your appearance. You then threw a large towel on the glass surface so that it was completely covered, went into the shower and found yourself crying briefly under that hot stream of water...