When I entered home Jackie came and hugged me.

"Thank you brother." he said and went.

I was happy to see Jackie smile. I promised to be changed and I hope I can do it.

Alex is calling.

"Hey." I said.

"Hey dude, where are you?" he asked, "I have called you for thousands of times."

"What do you want Alex?" I asked.

"Nothing, I just thought you wouldn't mind drinking." he said.

"Not now." I said.

"What? Ok bye." he said.

"Alex!" I cried.

"What? Have you changed your mind?" he laughed.

"Where are you?" I asked.

"Come to our pub." he said.


I ran to my room to take money. When I entered there was sitting my dad.

"Hello Ray."

"Hello dad."

"What's up?"

"Not much, I want to go somewhere."

"Where?"

I didn't want to cheat him, but I couldn't tell him the truth.

"Ray," he said, "life is a hard way which you have to pass. We all have two lives. The second one starts when we realize we have to start everything from the beginning. People have different reasons for the way they live. We can't put everyone's reasons in the same box. You have to have your reason, your aims. You have to find the sense of living, you have to live as you are on the way. Do it my son, you can do it." he said and left.


My dad's words, it's like he wanted to give me wings to fly. It is the time now. I have to choose.. turning the page or closing the book.

I wanted to have a rest and decided to sleep a little. When I woke up it was 7pm. I saw Jackie was looking behind the door.

"Come in Jackie." I said.

"Oh, you are awake. I’ve  decided something Ray." he said.

"What Jackie?" I asked.

"Let's go somewhere with family." he said.

"But, where?" I asked.

"I don't know. We can just go for a walk." he said.

"I agree." I said.

He smiled and went.

                                                       
I didn't know that I had such a good brother. He wanted us to be together. He wanted to change everything.

I dressed and descended down. My dad suggested going to a restaurant. We went. When we came back we all were happy. It was half past ten. When I lay down to sleep I saw Alex’s message: ''WTF Ray?''

In the morning I went to college. In the auditorium boys were laughing. I called Mark and asked what had happened.

''The boys are betting,'' he said. ''Don't you want to join? ''

''Don't know.'' I answered.

''Let's do it.'' he said.

''Oh Ray, are you going to join?'' asked the boys.

''What will we do?'' I asked.

''We have to get our newcomer.'' Ryan said.

''What?'' I asked.

''What is wrong? Henry, Ethan, you and I,'' Ryan said, ''okay, okay let’s start.''

Henry approached Belle.

''He doesn't want to lose time, ''said Ryan, ''what a boy. '' They laughed.

There was a girl near us. She was Sophia. I thought she heard about the bet. What if she tell about it Belle. I have to talk to her.

''Sophia!'' I cried.

''Yes Ray, what has happened?'' she asked.

''I know you know about the bet, don’t tell Belle about it, please.'' I said.

''What? Not to tell Belle? Are you mad?'' she asked.

''Sorry.'' I said and left.

I needed to drink. Maybe I wanted to drink just to forget again that I am doing such things that I remember about my being a beast.

The most beautiful and best things in life can't be seen or touched. We have to feel them, feel them with the heart. And what am I doing? I hate me.
I went there. When the last time I was there I thought I would never come back again. And I didn't know how I got there.

Everything is the same here, the same trees and the same bench. It would be so good if you were with me my dear friend. I can't continue living without you.

I was screaming. I started to cry.

The worst type of crying isn't the kind everyone can see: the wailing on street corners. The worst kind is happening when your soul is weeping and no matter what you do, there is no way to comfort it. You can love someone so much...But you can never love people as much as you can miss them.

I suddenly noticed that a girl was running to me.

''Who are you?'' she asked. ''Why are you crying?''

When I turned around there was standing Belle.

''Ray?'' she asked.

We both were amazed.

''What has happened? Don't you need help?" she asked.

''Everything is okay, thank you,'' I said. ''What are you doing here?''

''My house is nearby. I was going to a shop when I heard voices,'' she said, '' I see you are bad. Don't you need help really?''

''No, thank you, everything is ok.'' I said.

''In that case, I go,'' said Belle.

''Thank you again, bye,'' I said.

I thought that she doesn't know about the bet yet, but Sophia will tell her.

She smiled and went.

                                                        
I know this is what people say: ''You'll get over it. Oh, you'll be happy again, never fear. You can overcome. Everything is fantastic. Time heals all wounds, don't worry'' I'd say it, too. But I know it's not true. It can't be true. No one can tell me what I'm supposed to do right now. Right now I can't sleep. It's right now that I can't eat. Right now I still hear his voice and sense his presence by my side.

I am going Edward. This is not a goodbye, my dear friend, this is a thank you. Thank you for being in my life and giving me joy, thank you for loving me and receiving my love in return. Thank you for the memories I will cherish forever. And sorry. Sorry for taking away your life. Sorry my dear friend, sorry.