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Bye.
Новини
I thought... I will write more in here. Maybe like more than what I have wrote till now but not anymore. It doesn't change anything or make me feel any different than what I'm feeling rn. I think I should stop this. All at once. This is my last post. I don't know if I have the courage to delete this @ccount but this post is going to be it. The last one ever.
Don't let them ruin your day. You didn't give them a right. Ruin it yourself, if better.
Bye.
Life it is.
Новини, Особисте
Life. They said life is something so precious and so beautiful and it is to be cherished but why is my life like 'this'? Is there ANYTHING that didn't happen in my life and to be glad of? No. The answer wasn't bitter than I thought. Because now that I sit here, in the bedroom, seeing somebody who's on the verge to end their own lives and listening to my own parent being the addict herself, hurting people like they are born to do so, I realise something so real and practical. Life has never been easier. The more you work hard to work things out in the house the more you were meant to be ruined by your own mother and yourself. What is it? The motive. What was the motive behind all this mom? Can I even call you mom without you doubting my every shit? Can I even work to earn some fucking money without you ruining the 28 days in a month? Most of people in their lives want money, wealth, love, and etc etc etc but all I ever wished from you is what? Peace. I wanted peace. I never even talked to you unless you did. You know why? Not that I'm a careless daughter. Because you wouldn't stay still if I talked to you on my own. You can't even bare our faces or our existence. All you ever wanted was 'her' to suffer and what'd it get you? What was the profit of accusing SOMEONE of something which was actually done by your own family or whoever the fuck is in your life? Why'd you give birth? To do this? TO TORTURE LIKE THIS? WHAT, YOU ENJOY THIS? MAKING SOMEONE SUFFER? I don't know if you have a heart but humanity? Don't you have atleast that? How could you be so calm watching somebody slit their wrist so deep that the blood wouldn't stop to flow. What are you? And why am I still alive? If somebody is in my place would they be alive by now? Would they be? Would YOU be alive, mom? If you were in my place, would you be alive?
Same life, Same pain.
Новини
November 28, 2022.
A long year passed quick. But nothing changed. The toxicity my mom held only increased with every day that went by.
Today I'm alive, trying to stay as positive as I could.
Tomorrow, I don't know.
I might..end this so said life.
It's been long time... isn't it?
But same life, same fxcking pain.
