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Chaos Theory
All I see, did see, were fragments of Hope
On Forbidden Islands of the locus town
A Paradigm of chaos was laid in its walls
And the doors were locked with locks
Amidst the chaos, I saw you over and over again
What I never saw was the image of me
And that my dear, is the Chaos Theory
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Paranthesis
Never really thought about the void between us
About the stars, the moon and the fjords between us
You took me places, you brought me to life
You created cliffs, and taught me to survive.
And it never occurred after all this time
There were rivers, graves and forests between us.
I fell and kept on falling till you held me tight
And showed me the world,
A fake world and I smiled.
For I knew everything with you would be alright
Until the storm came and blew our dreams away
And in a minute all was gone, you were gone
For the time I just stood still in the storm
In the chaos and you weren't there next to me
I survived it all alone, just like you taught me
And then you came along but now I see things better
I see the void, I see the rain, I see you
You're not the same or perhaps just who you are
Only I see better now from this cave you build for me
All secure, all home-like, all captivated
But you love me so it's alright...
Just one thing I could never understand
After everything we did, why am I still in a paranthesis?
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429
Elemental
I'm diving into the deepest depths of my sadness,
Swimming into the ocean of sufferance
Which, at the same time, suffocates me
And I feel like something's missing,
Like something was supposed
To be with me but isn't.
My feets are grounded to earth
And I'm going into its deepest depths.
I surrender in the soil around me
Thinking about what's growing inside of me.
My life feels like it is, in fact, a touché
At one point I'm broken, the next, I'm okay.
I'm high up in the clouds, it is a dreamy day
But my life isn't a fairy-tale,
I'm blinded by flakes and ice crystals
They taught me how the wind blows
In different directions as if I wasn't sure
Whether my sadness was a petrichor.
My body is surrounded by flames
And it feels like my soul is on fire.
Something's burning within me
From a very long time,
And I see everything around me
Turning into the elemental vile.
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That One Bird
A million little worlds fluttered inside me
Caged and flying, lively and dead
Inside me like a jar of lights
And in darkness, I overheard death
Chirping like little scavengers
Sometimes tiny hums
All paused and broken by loud noises
They have fashionable outfits.
There were flying ones but I had to unlock some
The ones caged within
For they knew not where they come from
Or where they have to go,
So I let them all go and live
But just one stayed...
The one obscured within
The one that less travelled...
The one that was so me, and I never knew...
The one I finally became.
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I See a Friend in You
It has been a long time
Since I last saw you
Trapped in my own world
I didn't know you.
And now I see you
But from a distance apart,
I think I've known you
From a very long time.
I see a friend in you,
And all things we could do.
But we didn't because
We're worlds apart.
But I still see you
As you are and wanna be
A little part of your world
But can I?
Because I've just met you.
And still it seems like I've
Always known you.
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424
Vessel of Pain
Fill in me the lasts of your day
And get a beautiful jar of paints
Kill me with your heart supreme
And tell me how am I so lame.
This vessel of pain goes on,
And never ends until dawn.
Then it begins all again
So full of shame and hatred
It's pain and all sadness
Filled in me with recklessness
I think now I understand
What everything was all about
And the day ends once again,
And I have no one to talk to
To empty my vessel of pain
Oh and they say
It's such a shame...
But it's all mine
So let me carry it,
After all I'm just insane...
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Taken... by You?
Am I, perhaps, taken by you?
Are all my seconds left now few;
You own me as well my soul
Still drowning in your alcohol.
For midst day, I dream of us
By night you're so full of lust,
And so ignorant of inner beauty
Your words: 'good morning cutie'.
Am I less mine, and a lot more yours?
When you take and take what all you've lost;
And I'm all so giving without remorse,
Till even my last breath whispers forever.
Your soul raping words said so softly,
That it even sickens my modern day poetry.
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(Taken... by You? Well, who the hell are you?
If u have the power to love someone, you also have the power to unlove them and love yourself a little more than you did earlier. Yes, there's eternal love but it's not with a person, it's with the universe. And your home, sweetheart, is your own fuckin' heart... ❤️)
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Sunflower
Sunshine right over me
And I look like one sun itself,
My moon is your beautiful smile
Which gets lost before the sun sets in west.
I see you over and over
Every now and then
Your rays all over me
Becoming the sun on my forehead.
Therefore, it burns me sometimes
When I look at it
The way I look at you.
Sunflower, sometimes to my love
Gets lost finding its sun too.
With the moon before me
While the sun sets,
The sunflower is just a friend
And yeah I think it's love would be too much...
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How It Feels Like - Bipolar
My heart says...
"Like sadness it creeps in
On the insides of my palace
And I can't escape it -
A painless poisoned chalice.
It unravels multilayers of my soul
Till my ruptured thoughts feel personified
And I think I feel a bit too much...
Notwithstanding gigantic butterflies;
Just seems like the birth
Of this so-called new true love...
My mind feels perplexed
My emotions are twitching
Again and again, every single day!"
And I say...
"My heart isn't made for you to break
One more time..."
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(This poem is to spread awareness about bipolar disorder... "It's a psychiatric illness characterized by both manic and depressive episodes, or manic ones only." There was a time in my life when I've been through it, and it's still an everyday battle... But what matters is to accept it and live life as it is given to you... I do feel things a little too deep maybe... But nothing I'm ashamed of... I wasn't really allowed to talk about it... But now I really want to as I'm ready. And I just wanna tell that those who are out there and still dealing with it, I just wanna tell them that it's gonna be alright and you'll make it! :): (p.s. - I never thought I was gonna write all this in caption) 💙🖤💙🖤 crazy life tho...
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Also, this poem is in continuation with a previous poem that I posted earlier, "Creeper that Creeps within - Bipolar")
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Creeper that Creeps within- Bipolar
I am crumbling into a shallow cocoon
Like home of a sad caterpillar
Transforming into a euphoric vibrant butterfly;
Well f**k that, I'm a sad caterpillar again,
And again and now again a euphoric butterfly.
A catastrophe has hit my life
With happy endings in between the lines...
Though my hamartia ain't suffice!
And my breathing is suffocating
As the happiness kills new vibes...
It's like dangling to and fro from the extremes
Of a pendulum clock - 'my life'.
This is the sad truth and all things bad,
These have all been bottling up
And my stars didn't collide,
Can't live in the in-betweens.
My normal is not your normal
And your normal isn't mine;
These thoughts are all spilled on paper
Like a tragedy and a comedy,
Perhaps, a tragi-comedy - 'my life'.
And this creeper creeps into me
From all darkness and all light...
But to kill me,
No, my bipolar ain't suffice!
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This poem is to spread awareness about bipolar disorder... "It's a psychiatric illness characterized by both manic and depressive episodes, or manic ones only." There was a time in my life when I've been through it, and it's still an everyday battle... But what matters is to accept it and live life as it is given to you... I do feel things a little too deep maybe... But nothing I'm ashamed of... I wasn't really allowed to talk about it... But now I really want to as I'm ready. And I just wanna tell that those who are out there and still dealing with it, I just wanna tell them that it's gonna be alright and you'll make it! :): (p.s. - I never thought I was gonna write all this in caption) 💚🖤💚🖤 crazy life tho...
:(:
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407
I Miss the Me I was
I miss the me I was
The one I was,
A care free silly little girl
Blowing bubbles
Drawing on walls
And living in a fairy tale
A pretty princess
Who loved the world
And everyone in it,
To her she could just fit in
She was dreamy, and passionate
And beautiful inside out
Who knew that one day she would
Be all the women that inspired her
Who knew one day she was going to
Fall in Love with someone that was not her
Just to learn that she is beautiful too
She is lovable too
The world could see that
But she never could
She could find beauty in everything
From a stone on the floor,
To an animal as small as an ant
And god, she never knew love
Until she could love herself
Until she realized that she was the one
She has been looking for her entire life
And finally she is older now
Wiser and smarter
And cleverer
She still would learn many lessons
But who she was is gone now
That little girl is all grown now
I think she can take care of herself,
She's on her own now...
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A Love Like Mine
Do you see in me what I see in you?
A winter red and a summer blue,
Or a sunlight breaking into your room
When a bird is chirping after-noon.
Do you look at me the way I look at you?
Like lovers the stars of a night new,
Or with closed eyes, wishing a falling star
Like everyone else from near and far.
Do you want me like I want you?
Every second of every minute of every hour that's for-ever due,
Or just today when we're in a clause
And a life without us still goes...
Now even if you deny, that's all fine,
I am in love already, with a love like mine.
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Broken Mirrors
I'm in you and you are in me
And in all the places we've ever been,
Carrying pieces of one another.
For every You in Me there lives a Me in You
And in you I see, nothing but a reflection of me,
So when I was lost and I couldn't be found
I searched and searched for my pieces,
And I found and found that they were all broken
Just as broken was I as well...
Like shattered pieces of silvered glass
But I picked up all my pieces, little-by-little
And an object was so-formed before me,
Through the cracks of emptiness and brokenness of it all
An image could now be seen...
A mirror in which myself was clear
One that reminds me of me.
***Illustration by me***
(We leave parts of ourselves in places we go, people we meet. They are like mirrors to us. There's a part of us in them. What we see in others is a reflection of our own self. God is within us. If you ever get broken apart into pieces, or shattered, or lost, or don't know who you are then just observe your surroundings, observe the people and you'll find yourself. You'll heal...pick up the pieces and you'll start to create a mirror in which slowly you'll be able to see yourself.)
P.S. - This poem has been inspired by an episode of 13RW. Also, it is a sequel of my poems 'Remind Me of Me' and 'Image'
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Dominion
You don't own a person you love
It's in the way they are you love them
In love, you won't try to change them
In love, you wouldn't blame them
But it only seems to me
Countless number of boys I ever meet
Want Dominion over me
That's just what they don't know
I don't need them I'm not full of hopes
But they hurt me so bad
And want things to be done for them
Never understand the things I do in love
They wouldn't even do for a friend,
So they think they have Dominion
Over me but no they're all wrong
I stand here tall as I breathe
"You came to me, but I did not..."
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482
Woman
In the cold of night
She'd struggled to find her place in the world
Above her, she'd put everybody else
She's a daughter, a sister, a wife, a mother
It's in the way she carry herself
So gracefully and so easily
She can take care of everyone else even with tears in her eyes
But she had been misjudged and broken over and over by the world
But she has found truth and she knows herself
There's no lie in her fire
She seeks no help even in the face of adversity
And to any extent she can go to save her loved ones
Even if she had to bargain her soul to the devil himself
She's no less than a goddess herself
But the world understands her not
They say she had come from a man
But man comes from her they forget
And under all this torment, the pressure
She takes pride in herself, we call her - "Woman"
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Rebirth
Let me tell you a story of how things changed
My eyes wide open and I was feeling deranged
Someone felt me and caused so much pain
That I grew within me and became insane
How madly in love I was with him
That I could commit any of Satan's sin
When love wasn't reciprocated, there were running tears
All eyes can't see, I was running away with fear
Till death grew in me and at my last breath
I heard a name calling in capital texts
Who knew I would become so mad in love
With him who left me, a broken dove
Heard a whisper in the lowest of sounds
My own name it was, very well pronounced
So I came back from hell and heaven
Counted my days back - four, five, six, seven
I was in love, a love so deep that grew in me
And made me madly insane, I'd seen...
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504
I choose myself
For so long it has become a burden I carry
Of what could be, would be, or should've been
Days feel like withered leaves, whose journey is same
Down and down, they leave trails and then the next day follows
The burden overburdened upon me,
Pain, books and music that's all that is left with me
I live with a broken heart, an empty soul
Wishing sometimes to return back,
But past I've been and it has led me to what's now,
And the future would always remain the same somehow
I still feel sometimes the pain of burden of mine
Incomprehensible, but I would still smile because after all I've been through
I choose myself, for myself, by myself...
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Ever-after
If only I knew we would become this way
I would have crossed oceans just so we stay
For our ever-after, together when midnight's away
Under million stars of the moonlight gay.
I wish if only I could go back in time
I would like to relive every second with you
And honestly, I shall tell you how I loved it when you call me 'mine'...
But howsoever, we both knew that the seconds we've left were few.
If only time was still, I would talk all day long
As you approach me, I know I would blush
Just like the time when we first met, a beautiful song
Stuck in my head, everytime I saw my crush.
Since you left, I'm broke and broken my heart is,
If you ever come wandering back, you'll know it's you I miss...
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The Wild in You
Life's moving in fast forward
Gotta take a step now to show up
To chase dreams that you saw as a kid
For life's mist, all fogged up.
There are high tides now, rolling an inner tsunami
Have to live in this humdrum now
And wake up the wild in you
The roughness, the bold; the tattered, the torn
And call out for your Amazonia
To take a step out of your league
To move forward, to chase thy dreams.
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Strings
One day there will be broken strings of you
Looking for light in every ounce of a being -
Two hearts were torn from last night's catastrophe
And they couldn't be stitched till tommorow's daylight
Which was yet to come, as time slowly proceeds
But if you follow the lights, they'll guide you
To the world where hearts are made,
Just a little touch of love in everything you do,
And you'll be there in that world of love.
Just tell me if it's true, if you'll be there waiting for me as I'm here waiting for you
You'll be holding onto the very strings of you
Oh tell me my lover, can I have a clue?
But I must tell you: the ends where our strings would meet
That's where I would love you too
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For a Short While
I've known you for a short while,
Like droplets of water slip from a lily,
You've grown in me like the nile
When it goes on and on its way, silly.
Little I ever knew when you felt vile
For I was in love and I felt dilly,
Can, after all, we go to that extra mile?
Or we can spend time with words, really.
How very intense was our romance
But little did we have each others time
Was our love just a matter of chance?
But we loved the idea of us and our plans
Maybe, I would spend time in art and in rhyme,
But we never loved us for the time we ever had.
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Train
We're full of grief in the world full of sad people
We don't even know where the train takes us
If we be alive, we'll find some way
To board another of life's train
Unknown faces and known ones all come along the way
The train goes on and on and we sit silently
Then walk on the same footsteps of yesterday
There's no other train sometimes
Which results in quite a delay to reach our undefined destination
When it comes it moves and goes on again...
Tomorrow we might board another train
All the things would remain still and same
However, we shall try to find little moments of happiness
In the trains full of loneliness.
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Eyes
It's in the eyes that we do get lost
Find each others universes
The way in which the other was made
We see it all
We see it all with both our eyes open
We see all the love and cosmos
We speak to each other through our eyes
Eyes...oh.. Eyes they talk a lot...
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Moonlit Night
Take me to a place where stars shine in the arms of a moonlit night and you are staring at me, thinking about every word I ever told you and how we come to be this way, lost in some awesome story of us...
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572
Youngsters
We're shades of tomorrow
Not made of happiness nor sorrow
We move ahead in unison
And sometimes we are finding reasons
For what has become and what is becoming
Of this new generation, new world
We bring forth a passionate fire for our aims
We are looking for a life out of our madly insane past
And this is what makes our life so special
We heal, we crawl, we deal with everything thrown at us on our own
We get our own shit together
And that's what keeps us united, our efforts
We're all in this together
For we know in the coming years
What we will have to face in the outer world
And we don't wanna crawl to the edges
We're gonna move with the masses
We are the youngsters of tomorrow
We aren't made of happiness nor sorrow
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Chaos
The world was deteriorating as it should not
And when I saw the end of the world
It looked exactly the same way as before
Just with a change of time
My world was as it should be and as it has always been
Such soul destroying vivid scenes I've seen
I've stumbled upon debris but all I want now is
All that I already have - my chaos, my mess, my life
Life is full of intangible possibilities
That it is of no use to waste time solving the beautiful chaos my life is...
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Voices
There were voices, there always had been
Back there when no one was listening
They talk behind your back
And they'll make you think what you lack
What's even better, are the thoughts in the sack
They have been talking, like always
In different ways you'll have to pull away
As you sweep past with your tip toe shoes
You hear a voice at the back of your head
That's when you know what they've said
What matters however is your own space
That's all you need to keep up your pace
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Faults
We lived through our falsified beliefs
Another bad day, another sad day gone
Days overturn like lifeless leaves
One after another and I'm stuck thinking
Will you ever return for us?
For what we had is gone and we can no longer
Call us home. Was it destined to be this sorrowful?
Why did our chapter end this way?
These tears fall down my cheeks and you're not here to uplift me
Why did our stars cross-aligned?
It doesn't have to be this hurtful
But now all I see are our faults...
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499
Not Yours
You want me but you do not know
I'm not made of soil, I'm not gold
There are truths untold by you
You seem quite okay with how we grow
You startle me when you do not show
Oh, I've loved you enough for the both of us
Now it's my time to love myself more
You created kingdoms for me and then left me burning in its wall
You know me but you do not know
I'm not made of soil, I'm not your gold...
I'm not yours to keep, not yours to treasure
I'm a winged wild bird that cannot be stopped
You try to hold me back but baby, I'm free...
I'm not yours to keep, I'm not your gold...
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Rain Falling
Little did I know of the rain falling
When I first saw it,
It was sent from the sky
To me, where I stood on the earthly ground
Every droplet a starlight
A universe of its own
There were collisions of all kinds
As different drops fell at different places
As the rainfall profoundly grew
There were winters
I stood in my grey path with a black hoody
And watched the rain falling
As the rain fell it carried with it the atmosphere
The dirt and other unknown elements
I still remember the petrichor of that serene winter rain...
It was meant to fall from the sky up above
And fall on the earthly ground down below
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The Silent Skies
The silence in the air was profound
Skies were clear, the clouds engulfed
Any melody from below and from above
The deepening silence were platonic tremors
That rubbed against the very nature of the cloud
But oh rainfall, there was no rainfall...
There was a silence which was able to hear both melodies from above and from below
But to the sky it was deafening...
The rainfall was very needful
But it fell only when the rhythm faded...
The Silent Skies had clouds
Clouds with silver lines
Rainfall, was much needed but the silence had met the skies...
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His Parts in Me
You made me realize my chaos
Before it ever took out the life in me
You made me realize its calmness
And how I'm free...
So I gave it all to you, gave all my chaos
And you loved the most fragile parts of me
Sometimes my own demons chased me
Is it wrong that we know it all? Feel it all?
But there's one truth that I know of
And that exists
I can never return your parts
That you have given to me...
Summer, Winter, Autumn and Spring
You've found the calmness in my chaos...
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Butterfly
Amidst the shakles
I lived in my own little hamlet
Birds up above, my tangled garden
I found peace in whites
Where all abstracts were noun
And all noun, pronoun;
I gathered all the good stuff
Fixed people and tinkered stuff
Since the very days of my childhood
So the walls were fragile
My castle of glass found its architect
A million times since then, I've changed...
My heart would ablaze fire
My soul would crave love
Again, I gathered all the good stuff...
Since then however, my focus was
Not my Hamlet, neither your garden,
Nor castles, neither temples...
But one person I know everything about
Who taught me everything I really care for
Who taught me 'LIFE'
But you taught me grey and since that day
I'd smiled and lived actually
Found the missing jigsaw puzzle
But for my visitors, thank you
There's always an untaught chapter
I'd read you profoundly
Now my empty book needs me...
But you won't find me in my imagination anymore
No. Not anymore. Enough alacarte.
Learning to fly with wings maybe... Metamorphosis?
I'm living-lively on - 'nights and mornings'
Because that's the way of peace...
A butterfly with a broken wing...
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572
Let it be
Live up for today
Tomorrow I don't know
I haven't seen or heard from it
A long time ago
It comes late when I've lost
Today; but today I've to win.
Yesterdays' sorrows crave upon
I don't know how much of today is left for me
But today I choose myself
And be grateful for the 'LIFE'
I've been through, I'm being and I will be...
It's the moments we come across
Sometimes you have to just let it be...
And your life will come upon
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498
A letter to my mom
The initial expression of beauty
I saw in you, mother
All qualities of life that you have taught me
By giving this opportunity to be alive
To feel and to live, and to live better...
How tenderly you held me
What all days and nights you have took care of me, that I could never return
With all your love you have made me,
Who I am today...
It is important to tell you mother,
How much you mean to me,
Otherwise, all days would just pass by,
And today, I wanna tell you
How much I'm grateful to have u in my life
The first reflection of God I'd seen in you
Those things that you have done for me
That I don't even know about
You made me who I am today, Mom
Even in your scoldings, there is so much love
Though I can never return all the care of a mother
What she does for her child is a boundless universe
But can only pass it on as you have taught me...
And I love you till eternity for that...
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I'm unable
One day, it felt pass me
A chaos of thought,
Some moments ago
Was I believing a truth
It dealt pass me
I'm unable
To comprehend
The choices that I took
The steps I've made
I'm unable
To learn
Thoughts move within me
of unknown origin
From all walks of life
Thrown upon me for choice
Every rush of an hour
And I choose however for a moment
And some moments later another
And my life becomes a chaos
I can't figure out
I'm unable
To live
In moments, I'm too lost in thoughts
Right now, it breaks me
And fixes me, and then again
I'm stuck in my mind
Without trying, I'm hurt
and I do hurt
What makes sense and no sense
And sometimes all sense
And I can make up things into what I want to believe in
And what not, and reality I don't believe in
I'm stuck in my chaos full of emotions
I'm unable.
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656
The Room of Love
There's always a way out of love -
A door open somewhere in the same room
You both stand.
Sometimes you reach nearer to it;
Perhaps not every single moment is of love
There will be other feelings as well...
But the room of love is eternal and it forever stays!
No matter however small or big the room might be
The door is always there.
Sometimes it seems as though you have left,
Your presence could not be felt,
But you never exited from the door
So your love would wait for you in that room
Time flies, you'd come back
Maybe to exit from the door this time,
But do that, and you set the other person free of love
And sometimes out of love, you would want to leave
You would open doors, and if you exit
You know there's no way back in
Then you leave that love for love's sake,
And you might have proved love,
And you might have as well loved truly,
And you might love from outside the room after that,
But then, the room is always about the ones who stay...
The room is always about the ones who stay...
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487
Parts of Me
One day, he'll miss parts of me
Those that I'd given away,
They have made their places
In his crevices
And must have lighten up his days.
One day, he'll realize those parts of me
That I'd so selflessly given away,
With every piece of me still intact,
But I'm hurt day-by-day...
I think he'll soon realize,
Those parts would be rainbows all around him
He needs them I think
My parts more than I do...
What about me? I wonder sometimes...
Without some parts, will I be able to survive?
But I think I can;
Those parts of me
That I'd given away so easily
and which I can never get back from him,
But for myself, I'll grow again
My very new roots from under my skin...
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536
An Hour Ago
The spirit within, perforated
from the jargons of life...
Nearest; an hour ago,
and some hours thence,
but being seived constantly.
Someone pirated conflicts of mind
I'm seeing my demons eye-to-eye.
Shivers down the spine; I breathe profusely.
The Darkness is very platonic
Drives to the dark sea; for drowning
Strangles 'heads' below waters...
The wicked 'tales' of devils.
A toss of a coin, took my breath away...
Brought back to life, risen from ashes
Cognized the conical chalked forgery
And lived my mess again...
Some hours ago, and some hours thence,
What a mess I was, and I still am,
A lot more now perhaps...
Will I stir out, from my tangled mesh?
This time, maybe, from ashes
And bring out the euphoria -
The brightest of lights from my crevices!
And burn brighter for all my days...
3
2
603
Falling in Love
You take me down
And then a little higher
You push me up
Then you just wanna hold me
I wanna dance with you
Now can't you just see it?
Pull me closer
Then you can just feel it
All this love
That we can't let go off
You're pulling me in
And I don't wanna run too
Are we taking things harder?
Just the way we want to
I think it's love
And all I can tell you
This is exactly the way
I'd always wanted...
4
0
487
Remind Me of Me
In times like these
When I surrender myself to thee
Upon my will, to the world
Remind Me of Me
The Creator of all Arts.
In times, when I've lost all hopes
When my life comes to a standstill
When nothing moves within me
And I forsake my world for the world of thee,
To please somebody and I'm unable to
overcome my fears
Remind Me of Me.
Remind Me, how stable and strong I've been
All these years.
Tell me, about myself when I've lost me
Grant me patience to wait and see,
To learn and forgive, and to be satisfied
With what I have and choose to love what has become of me…
4
2
520
LIFE
You'll see, but you'll never live
You'll let your life pass by and remain still
You'll not feel the things and nothings that will come to you...
You'll simply let them go, let it all go...
These gentle things of life, make you
Your own and on your own you'll have to live
Remembering that time would be still
Something beyond temporary emotions would ooze out of your plasma
And your warm blood would cover your entire soul with flames!
You'll inhale your deepest fears, your deepest desires,
You'll rejoice and at the very same time you'll cry
Everything would come to a standstill,
You'll be ruthlessly rendered to rammage conflicts of your mind
That is unable to take in, all the simple truths that have come to light!
You'll be broken, you'll be mistaken, you'll be woken up from your fairy tales
And at last, you'll learn 'LIFE'
4
3
663
Magical
You make my world seem so fair,
A little crazy, but full of care,
I don't know the answers,
To all those questions you've been asking,
What I know is, u matter,
And it's something...
My upside down world seems so stable now,
What did u do? Have you put a little spell on me...?
Because stars shine brighter now, and it's all magical
What I see...
4
0
541
Second Chance
(song)
One day, I lost love... and then I, gave it up
One day, my heart cuts... and then I, sewed it up
One day, you were calling... and should I, pick it up?
I wish... I knew... I knew...
And if it all gets wrong; I know I'll be strong
So strong! I will be.... I know...
So don't stand right here.... next to me, for a second chance,
All the love that we made, can't exist... for a second chance,
You'll wish... I could... give you time, for a second chance...
You'll wish... I know.... I knowwwwww........!!!!!
All the time that we had, isn't made, for a second chance!!
All the love that we made, can't exist... for a second chance,
So go on and on and on... and you'll see
One day, I lost love... and then I, gave it up
One day, my heart cuts... and then I, sewed it up
One day, you were calling... and should I, pick it up?
Noooooooooo... And I know, I know
I'll be strong enough...
5
0
642
To Lose Myself
Whist you can't even hold my flames
You're everything that I ever wanted,
But I just love way too much
And that's all I'm afraid of - 'To lose myself'
6
0
576
One Day
Our nation - oh, the way it screams
Lightning thunder and blood therein
Martyred for our precious lives there
They're laden with blood, it seems
Courage, bravery, and a lot more it takes
Than revenge, sorrow, and hatred,
It's beyond war, it's inhumane,
One day, they shall rise again,
Our prayers for those who remain,
And those thy hath taken away...
Every single drop of blood they'd shed,
Is tears in the eyes of those who've felt,
The pain and agony, of the place in the world
That creates heroes and superheroes,
They're much more than that
They die for us, and we will never forget
All through the days and nights
They're fighting on the border
So that one day, it will all be over...
And for that one day, they shall live...
And for that one day, we shall live...
*****
(The poem is dedicated to the soldiers who had and who are fighting for their country against the growing terrorism.)
4
0
381
The Way I is
Shifting on sands
Over debris I'd fallen
Like clefts of sand dunes
I'm drifting like a shell.
Sometimes, I'm wet
Sometimes bathing in the sun
Like a Goddess of Victory.
In moments I'm the one
Who lives in fantasy
My sea shell protect me,
I break open sometimes
And loose myself to fit thy needs
I'm corals of the ocean,
I survive my life out of the dead past
I'm a rare piece of pearl you can't own
And sometimes you'll see me shine...
I'm a fragile mess, I'm weak and strong
And other things in between
I'll fall, I'll grow, I'll become so much more of me
I'm a child, who'll like to play with you
I would color the ground blue...
And I'll turn myself into a catastrophe
And you'll see different parts of me
Scattered all over sands, and then you'll see
That I'm more than all the things that make me -
I'm human and I can be everything, no curbs
All at once because that's exactly the way I is...
7
0
558
Ahead
As if drunken walking on a footpath,
Unaware of where it would lead,
Unconscious of the past, but dangling in today,
We stumble, but we move ahead.
No extra time for all those miseries,
They're to be handled right there,
With all the opportunities and happenings that unfold themselves,
We were drunken walking in the night-time,
With a bright daylight ahead.
We don't know, don't know anything at all,
We stumble and fall, and little conscious of our hopes,
We follow the given situation, the given route,
That will only lead ahead...
7
1
621
The Element
The same element from which I was made, was made he,
Our souls singing the same symphony,
Hearts beating the same sane beats,
I stand still as the breeze of him passes by,
And he stands still as my locks tangle over his face,
In unison, our universes would collide,
They're more synced than the mirrors of our eyes,
He says half words, which only I could feel,
I complete him, as he fills my world,
Like the jinxed old school puzzle pieces,
He was my piece, that completed my life's picture, and I was his...
The element of nature...
6
1
603
Dancing in Love
We were dancing in the moonlight,
With no where to go,
Raised beats, sunken steps
And a tip toe for half an hour
Then our hearts met like two giant supernovas!
And the starlight? We called it love.
7
3
608
The Rush of Life
Walking on grey paths
As if nothing really matters
Broken hearts healed
Lost lost, and was found again...
Moments, days, years overturned
Pages and nothing really mattered.
People went, people came
Some laughs, we pretend
But nothing ever made life special
Was it hate? A vile of poison...
Life went on...
Nothing breaks, Nothing makes...
And then one day it's all gone
As if nothing ever mattered...
Before you realize in a matter of time
In life, it's madness
Killed inside by sadness
Before you could take away all hate,
Life is done, and it's all over,
Talk, maybe you save someone...
To live a little while longer...
10
3
601
Phoenix
My mess, my tangled mesh, I stir out
I see flashes; and sparks sometimes,
Enough for a lifetime full of wars.
Ash-risen, my head held high
Myself again: 'better burns and bruises'
I'm alive when my soul is on fire!
Wings feathered away to dreams of hopes,
Later that day, I'd become a bird
All I dreamt of being, of becoming
A phoenix, for my self-recreation...
5
4
537
Love
I wanna feel everything that is you
From your hair to your feet
From you skin to the soul beneath
From your heart to all over mine
I wanna feel till I could feel no more
And then you'll know that it's love...
*****
(💖❤ "Love is a feeling, not a verb. It isn't something that someone does, it's something that someone feels." For example nervousness is a feeling. When you're nervous you'll be doing things nervously. When you're in love, you'll be doing things in love. But those things aren't a proof of you're love. Love isn't materialistic, it's unconditional. So if someone tells you, that they love you, that would be the same as they happy you, they sad you, they nervous you, and therefore it doesn't mean anything until you feel their love... .)
7
3
559
Stolen Leaf
A midsummer's autumn leaf
Dropped from the sky
And flew into a small pond
When a breeze was passing by...
It was lifted up to a walking
passer-by
And got stuck on his shoes
Walked with him, without clue
Rising onto another person's hat...
Which flew away in the autumn wind
With the leaf upon its inside
And landed on a bird's nest
Stolen anew by the little thief...
5
0
673
Krypton
These days, a killing
To sorrow I'm willing
I'm living but dying
My grief unprojectable
My weep you, wanted
To stop, it's killing.
My story, ain't thrilling
My words aren't willing
Misplaced words they, a telling
Is the joke I'm saying
Or making one of my life.
Tired of being, of living
The world is cheating,
Betraying, liars are waiting,
My good thoughts, a fading...
But I'm trying and trying
Not to krypton, that's shaking.
4
0
537
Flames of Fire
The fire is growing
making every inch of my life
warm with its flames,
It's making me feel better
to be able to light this
wild fire; these wild and crazy,
reckless, dancing flames.
It's making me mad,
But I think, I can contain it
I have to, there's no choice.
For I know when frost comes up,
I'll look in every ounce of a being,
Lost pieces of you...
5
0
621
Image
You are my image
The kind that I can't let go,
When I look at you
I see the whole wide world
That you carry under your skin,
And all I want then
Is to hold your hands for a while
Before you grow beneath me,
You keep running back and forth
But this time I'll be with you
I may perish but I won't let go...
4
0
527
Forever
(song)
I'll sing all day long,
Your melody is so sweet
I know you're missing me,
Like we're never gonna be
Together... But it's Forever...
Why don't you meet me at the sunset,
Where birds are chirping in the high clouds,
Singing our melody,
Yeah.... Yeah
I'll miss you all day long,
And I know you miss me, me too...
Like we're never gonna be,
But at least we can see,
The perfect day where
You and me
We're together...
Together... Together....
Why don't you call me on the phone?
Like you used to...
We're growing up together, weren't we friends too...
Ohhh woahhahah...
Like a perfect day, over the sunset spray,
I miss you every single day...
Come back to me
we're forever!!!
I'll sing all day long,
Your melody is so sweet
I know you're missing me,
Like we're never gonna be
Together... But it's Forever...
7
0
582
Be Mine...
(song)
I'd slept, through the night...
With a picture of you,
The way you smiled,
Was beautiful too...
Be mine. Be mine.
Be mine...
All the love that I
Gave to you...
All you were
You were so damn true...
I'd missed you,
All along, and now that you're gone,
I could feel, no more home...
All I wanted was, just to be around you...
Woooooooah woahhh...
Be mine. Be mine.
Be mine.
Oh, I'll love you too...
Be mine...
5
1
631
Perfect Imperfections
If you do mistakes
And cry over wreck
Hoping things will be better
You're Perfect.
If you're not pretty
And put on make up
Then you need not
Because You're Perfect.
If you fail everytime
But you keep trying
And trying
You're Perfect.
If you're alone
All on your own
Keep going
Because You're Perfect.
If no one likes you
And if you think that you're
Imperfect
Then that's okay
You're Perfectly Imperfect...
7
0
583
Memories
Memories of You
Left a reminiscence in me
As I was for you
You were for me.
Your light brown eyes
That care-free smile,
Your jazzy looks,
All I revived.
Looking at you sideways
An anxious thrill, like a breeze
When you walked pass me
I relived every single skipped-beat.
There was something very genuine
About the way you were withered,
I wonder if only you knew -
"You were beautiful in and around"
13
6
681
Battle of Life
Like a restless army we daily go for war,
On battlefields, ladden with pains of who we trust,
Swimming in the tears of sadness,
For the daily course we had to run,
We don't see no enemy ahead, he's trapped
In the darkest fears of our minds,
And we go like a restless army on war,
Thinking we're fighting our sandstorms;
Our minds are full of pity and love,
We don't run our force on grounds,
We're the army of endurance and perseverance,
For we see in the world full of struggle,
Our opportunities to make a living.
5
3
504
Scarlet Letter
You met me as the first drop of rain,
That I needed from a long-long time,
But I didn't know that I'll become so madly insane,
That I'll desire nothing, but to see you smile.
Don't make love with others, you're truly mine,
And I'm yours, and the whole world, I don't care about,
That's the kind of scarlet I'm made of.
Of all crazy lovers, of historical times,
No one would have written a scarlet letter,
And I know, no one else can love you better.
Crying tears went all in vain, I didn't feel anymore rain,
Oh, there was so much pain!
If only you'll understand the same-sane red.
I wish when I'm gone, you'll remember me,
As the first drop of rain, that caused you so-so pain,
But made you ever so better, from all the love that she gave,
And if you ever want me back, write me a scarlet letter.
7
1
473
Cold Fever
Weak and cold as days now seem,
So unwell like a fire died within,
A cold fever that runs in the storm,
From lost love, an infectious disease I caught.
A fearful jitter through my broken soul,
Numb life is moved over gravel roads,
Shining on a darkling moon-lit night,
With waters that rolled down my eye.
Don't know no direction, no person too close,
Walking on an endless breathtaking storm,
So full of emotion, longing for a soul,
A soul, just anyone, to light a fire in this cold.
6
2
526
The Voices In My Head
I've been hearing voices in my head,
I don't wanna believe what they've said,
They just talk to me; show me,
How fearful I'm, how careless I could be.
They don't end, like a non-stop playlist on repeat,
And on and on it plays in a shuffle,
A shuffle of thoughts, here and there, making chaos everywhere,
Being stabbed with a spear,
Don't know what to believe, what to think,
Not in my control. No, not anymore.
Like the noises under my bed on a darkling night,
They scare me like a ghost, which I know isn't alive,
I've been hearing voices in my head,
I don't wanna believe what they've said...
8
0
533
Always
In the way that I miss you,
I'm losing a part of myself,
Deep down there's an inner chaos and a growing fear,
That when I see you, you won't understand me, dear.
In the way that I miss you,
I can't stop thinking of you,
Because if I could, that would be the end,
The 'The End' of my very existence.
In the way that I miss you,
Your absence is the 'all of my everything',
Because you, my dear, are my everything,
Without you, I'm not me, and I just can't be.
In the way that I miss you,
I'm falling in love with you every single day,
And it's harder still to believe that,
Though you're not here, you'd always been here, right here in my heart,
Always...
6
0
530
Free Like A Bird
In the end, I go away,
Fly to the heavens above,
With one wish in my heart,
"What if I lived outside my cage?"
My cage of thoughts, my golden cage,
So beautiful it was, I'd hardly went outside,
Everyone around me, became my life,
They'll surround me, with my expectations high.
But this cage doesn't let me fly,
I was trapped in my own mind,
Yes, we need to think before doing things,
But too much thinking is not so good.
What I got from the cage? Nothing,
Yeah, it made me a poet, but made me sad too,
As I felt too much, than I was meant to,
Made me happy as well, it was a golden cage perhaps.
But all of this was not good, but now that I'm free,
I can spread my wings, as I leave my golden cage
And all of a sudden, I feel a sense of freedom,
Now that I've realized, a golden cage is still just a cage...
7
5
504
All That You Are
With all your thoughts in your mind
Life is a mess and chaos.
Well, but that is what makes life so speacial
It's all about having those thoughts
That makes you a more you.
And though life has to end,
You can live a little while longer
If you be present in every single moment
That you live, fill it with everything,
And all that you are, all that you feel like,
Be just as you want to be, and don't second judge yourself,
Don't waste time tryin'a find or understand
The madness of who you are!
Don't mend your soul, let it blend in the surrounding...
And that'll make you a more you, a little more of yourself,
And then, you'll actually find yourself, the 'all of yourself', and this,
This is what makes life so speacial!
6
2
514
Just A Crush
When I see him, I can't say a thing,
I would smile, words get lost,
I had never had this feeling before,
He talks to me, and I speak less,
Other wise a jumble of thoughts,
Come out from me, and I'll blush.
Hope he hasn't noticed this yet,
I don't think he ever notices me,
But I can't take my eyes off him,
And that's just suffice for me,
That he'll talk to me, and I'll smile,
Words get lost, and jumbled thoughts,
Come out from me, and just that much,
Makes me a bit more happier,
Thinking of him, I feel more like me,
If only to put it in words, I'll say it's just a crush... ❤❤
8
1
521
The World Alone
The world alone a place,
Not lonely for anybody,
If you escape into the realm,
All music and beauty you see,
A place so wonderful,
Even in the dull gloom of life,
Escape into that serenity,
The world alone is that place...
Your thoughts can take you there,
Can bring you down elsewhere,
It's how you choose to be,
To be or not to be,
Take a leap, from the breaths of time,
From the mishaps and illusions of life,
Exist in the realm of music and beauty,
And you alone can survive,
And discover moments that there are,
You can feel suffice,
The world alone is a beautiful place,
The thoughts leading the way,
Live the time of your life...
4
3
750
Metamorphosis
Sometimes you have to fall,
You have to fall sometimes, you know,
And fall into a silky cocoon
That is obscured to the world where you crawled.
Sometimes you have to change,
You have to change sometimes, you know,
And change inside the silky cocoon
That is shown to the world where you're known.
Sometimes you have to fly,
You have to fly sometimes, you know,
And fly out from the silky cocoon
That is lustre to the world where you'll flutter.
3
4
521
My life, My Mess
It looks life to me,
When things are a little too bad,
When I'm a little too sad.
But it's my life, quite wrecked though,
Streched to endless chaos,
And my pathetic remorse,
With a sprinkle of spangling thoughts.
It may be hard to see its light now,
It's magical; just invisible right now.
But at the end of the day,
I only want this life,
Where I've stumbled and fallen, fallen on debris,
Where I stood up and continued, continued to breathe.
I'd made a whole lot of mess out of it!
But even if it has all gone wrong,
I think I just wanna live in this mess now,
As it looks so-like life to me...
7
2
661
From The Ceiling Fan
As dead, as you can imagine,
My frail soul has become
From 'incoherent thoughts'
And my submissive self, I know.
End it up! End it all now!
"But you can't live in this cruel world,
No... not any longer"
Stop! Stop! Let me go... you owe me this life that I've so hardly achieved
"Hang yourself from the ceiling fan!
You'll be saved from this soul-scratching destruction!
It will end all the tears, it will end all the rains"
After dying my everything would go in vain!
"Your soul will be freed, can't you see?"
I'll die, you monster, that dwells within!
Stop! Stop! Someone stop my thoughts!
"You die, and there will be no more pain!"
Pain, pain, all this pain of course!
From the ceiling fan, you'd kill me with me pain,
This pain, which I had crafted myself,
So careful designed, that I don't get hurt,
So wrecked from life, that I would hang myself,
From the ceiling fan! It makes no sense!
"You're patent; it's just your survival extincts"
Says 'incoherent thoughts'; here ends all my hopes...
6
0
501
Colors
Who knew these colors were yours?
They lay scattered on the floor, anyone would think they must have got lost,
Those colors you let lose wherever you went,
You colored your world with your hands, and you see it the way you like to see it,
Who knew those colors were left by you?
Tattered on the ground, they didn't move, they'd been broken,
By the world, by this world, because of which you're made this way,
The way you are, and the world sees your colors,
It's not blinded by them, they lay shattered in the ground, and we all see it,
Nobody has ignored you ever, your colors are just at that place,
Not like before! Not much alive! but they are coloring, they are coloring with every broken piece of them,
With every fallen piece of them, they color, and that's what you have shown to the world, your colors...
7
2
573
The 'Kid' In You
Strangle me with faces, from all the different races,
Tell me the fairer of all, the most good looking,
The better and the worst and let's compare, and let's just leave out all the rest
Any problem with that now? You've been doing that with yourself.
I used to think, "I wish I had a small nose, and big lips and I was made of fair skin... "
But when I was just a kid, no such thoughts entered my head,
It was all amazing, the childhood years, and then we all grew up, and faced tears,
Losing friends, making new friends, and then losing them too,
In between the lines, the cartoons were replaced by movies,
And chatting became our new hobby,
Our looks became our priority, we didn't lay much attention to what we like,
But what others liked,
Well then, I think, back in childhood, I was more wise,
Playing in the dirt, playing with the clay, think of a good old summer day...
Times were then, and times are now, but things have changed anyhow,
Through these years we've learnt, we've done mistakes and understood,
We can't turn back time now,
And yeah it's true, we'll still do mistakes, again, and again, and again...
So don't be so mean with youself, you're just a kid who's coloring the sky with 'green'
5
2
485
What if...?
What if we only saw the colors that we wanted to see?
What if we were asleep and all of this was just a dream?
What if tomorrow didn't come and it was too late?
What if the world was upside down, and we were downside up?
What if the truths become lies, and the lies become truths?
What if we cried and rather felt more alive?
What if we loved people and they loved us back too?
What if the stars shone for us, and just for us?
What if the sky was painted blue, and gravity was an invisible glue?
And what if all of this was real, but we thought otherwise...
6
0
491
Midnight's Soul
The world was nothing but a midnight's soul,
Scattered in wrong approaches all along;
Closed eyes won't sleep, take it easy,
Midnight approaches, dream along...
For the world would see, and the world would dream,
So many thoughts that form the infinite blue...
As midnight approaches, its soul will live,
Then the closed eyes fall asleep...
5
2
539
Galaxy
Momentarily here I stand,
Momentarily here I live,
With quiet words and a quiet mouth,
I live in a galaxy that's super bound.
Far, far away from your planet's reach,
What you see is just the image of it.
Still, still somehow, I surprise me now,
For the journey of one's own discovery
Has no end, just no end...
6
5
509
Gateway To Hell
I followed you half way through,
Pushing the odds against the world,
You were my life, my only reason to survive,
You found me, when I got lost,
And took me to the Gateway of Hell,
You opened the doors for me, and there, you kept me waiting,
Till my bones weakened from dark blood, till my body seized to move,
Till my muscles ached from the harms done,
Where the scars had cut open my skin and made rooms, you kept me waiting...
In that time, I had to keep hope in 'us'; I couldn't forget you,
I knew that I was in Hell, you never loved me but you didn't leave me too,
I had to stay with you, without choice; and fall in love with your darkside,
My soul was asking for you, and I couldn't deny,
It was touched by your darkside, and wanted more and more of you,
Demons made this love, I could feel it,
For our angels never met; we opened up our hearts and stabbed them to death,
They were made of neither love, nor hatred,
Still so strong they were, that they belittled the creeping pain, till we could feel no more,
Our bodies kept pushing us apart, but our souls crept together,
Before having met you, I've lost my everything,
And when I met you, I knew it was you that I had lost,
But you stagger me when you say you never took me to the Gateway to hell...
4
6
509
Sorrow Market
There were a thousands sorrows,
All kinds of sorrows, we're in a market of it.
Some traders, buyers, and sellers have cheap stock,
'Losing a loved one', 'confused of life', 'rejection of hope'...no surprise.
Some are gifted for free, even without buying,
What can we do? We are trying.
A light burns bright, from a nearby merry market,
The last light of hope, overspreads over morrow,
Intangible sorrows all hung over ceilings...
Killed by hope, a new trader in the market,
When I saw me go away from the market of sorrow,
I knew I will come back tomorrow,
Not for selling or buying, but to live a life worth living,
Because after all, there's no merry without sorrow.
3
6
497
Hunger
Never have I felt such pain,
Such pain that grew wild inside of me,
Such pain that was not a feeling,
But was a part, that grew mad inside of me.
For food was nowhere around of me,
Hunger-thirst lived inside of me,
In a two storey building, getting thicker and thicker,
I got to do something, my instincts told me, quicker and quicker!
So I closed my eyes and counted till ten,
I thought I'd dream of food, so I can have a good meal,
I wished I won't wake up hungry,
Hoping, I won't wake up at all, so I won't feel hungry.
When I opened my eyes, I could feel no pain anymore,
There was no more rain,
And this was good, wasn't it?
The part that was alive had died inside of me...
As hunger and thirst grew wild inside.
(Please, if you can, provide food to those in need of it; millions die every single day, just because the way this world is made - "rich becomes richer and poor, more poor"... Even your small contribution can help someone... Everyone deserves a life worth living, and if you can be a source, then why not? 🙏)
3
3
488
Mr. Lonely
Will u call me?
I'm your old friend Mr. Lonely.
Been a time since you haven't phoned me,
Was quite busy with the world,
Now lets get back to some work,
I've some friends. You would like to meet them,
Just old pals, Anxiety and Depression,
Why have you closed doors on me?
I'm here for a welcome party; Let me in,
We'll enjoy for a awhile, and 'never leave',
I mean 'will leave' and come back,
When you need us... Have a great time,
It's been a while you haven't seen us,
I'm sure you'll need us,
If you get time, I'm sure you would like to meet us...
5
1
535
Someone Somewhere
Someone Somewhere is searching for me; I know,
As I'm also looking out for that person
In every human being I meet,
And some day, we may come across each other,
Find what we've been looking for,
And realize why it never worked with anyone else...
Someone Somewhere would be wanting for me,
Wanting the part of me that I think was ugly,
Wanting the ME that nobody liked,
Wanting the ME who is the real ME...
The one who I truly am,
I'm sure when I'll meet him, he would understand me
And love me so much that I can want for nothing else...
But I won't be dying in the hope to actually meet him,
Because I have a life, a wonderful life, that I need to live,
I'm sure he would like to hear my life's stories,
And not how I gave up on life in wanting to have him...
Anyways, I may never meet that person, I don't know...
But he exists, and that I know,
And in that love, I can stop giving myself to just anybody,
Live with all my heart and give love to everyone and myself,
So that I can for once, lift my head high, for I'm sure,
Even if I don't get to meet my 'Someone Somewhere',
I know that I'll be doing just fine... :)
5
1
582
Twinkle-Twinkle
Twinkle-Twinkle, oh, 'not so little star',
You render ME to wonder,
What you really are!!
You're up above my world; so high!
I think I'll never reach you,
And time would pass by...
To think this, it makes me cry.
Twinkle-Twinkle, my Superstar!
How can I reach you, whilst you're so far?
But my hopes and dreams never get lost,
As You Twinkle-Twinkle all time long...
7
2
531
All Will Be Gone
We're walking towards the funerals of our own deaths,
That's how life is; we don't know how much of our time is left,
Before we have our last breath; so live this moment because it's not coming back,
Whether it be sad, or good, or another worst day of your life,
They're more to come, and who knows how many,
The moment before you just die, you live the most,
You recall all the good stuff, not the worries you've been through,
Not the tomorrows and yesterdays that fill your mind, and ruin today,
But a peaceful soul who's ready for the final day,
The truth of life is -
We'll die, and all will be gone, so make the best of this very moment,
This very moment is everything that you got...
8
10
679
Torturer
Running inside my head, you've been saying things to me,
Making me cry all day long,
In the end, you prove the blame is on me.
I've been lying to myself, thinking that only you can love me,
And now all that I've left, is the shit that I used to see.
Now, my body doesn't collaborate, my soul is not free,
You've been making me sick, with all your words which went right through me,
In the end, you just come to me, in need for explainations,
As if I was the one who was behind all these frustrations,
You've been killing me with tears, saying I was the damn torturer,
But before you put the blame on me this time,
Let me tell you, I'm always the most hurt.
5
0
567
Tragic Comedy
Save me from thinking about the tragedy I live in,
Out there in the crowd, the audience shouts; they want to see me,
Back stage, here I'm, fighting all the things that I had to go through,
No friends, no fun; just bodyguards surround me,
My reputation I don't care about,
But I'd made an image, and I have to maintain it;
All day, all this drama, makes me sick, someone save me,
I've become an actor, living a tragic comedy.
No matter what my life is, they need smile for the cameras,
Deep down I've been crying, someone stop the lights and the drama!
6
5
613
Fire Dance
I'm a burning flame,
I can throw fire at you,
Don't come closer to me,
My love is not free.
I can send you to hell,
And then ask you to dance,
I got a burning soul,
I have some fire in my hands,
I can throw it at you,
And then ask you to dance.
10
2
665
Oh, just don't!
Oh, don't tell me you'd break me,
You haven't got the chance to make me;
Oh, don't tell me you can hurt me,
You can't even stand the storm I run in;
Oh, don't throw words at me,
You haven't, after all, understood what my world really is;
Oh, don't tell me to change myself,
You don't know, but I only do what I tell myself;
Oh, don't think you can have me,
I'm a burning fire you can't even hold me;
Oh, don't think you can hurt me,
You can't ruin the soul that's already been crying;
Oh, don't tell me you love me,
You're the summer-autumn rain, that disappears suddenly;
Oh, and just don't think my tears kill me,
In fact, they cure me, so that I can be free...
7
4
673
The Act of Love
You can be happy in love, you can be sad in love,
You can act as if what you're in, is 'love',
Listen to your heart, because this is important,
What you call as 'love', maybe, wasn't.
You make promises in love, you get confused in love,
Love was never easy, it was always complicated,
Ask old people, or read love tales -
"Love dies for love, love lives for love."
The act of love was never important,
What matters is the 'always' that stays forever,
If you are in love, you would cross the oceans,
If it was an act, you would play in the puddle.
8
4
599
Empty Soul
They say you fill your empty soul by giving the love that you got,
I say I did, but it's empty still,
How can that be? I'd given all the love I had,
And in return had got none,
What I got was sad tears and just some silly words,
I think about that all the time; I just can't help it,
My empty soul remains empty, but his overflows with love,
With the promising love that I'd given him;
But he gives that love to someone else,
And my soul remains empty still...
6
0
650
Winter River
His love is a winter river in which I drown, but never die,
He saves me from suffocation, as his lips traces mine,
But it's the effort of my thoughts, that I feel so alive.
Maybe something inside me had long died and I didn't know,
Maybe he burns with passionate flames, that light my burnt ashes.
I stand still in the moment, if he ever calls my name,
In the crowd, my eyes look for the music of winter waters,
And when finally they come upon his frost fallen bank,
He smiles and pretends to have won the lovers game,
I drown in his river; maybe he'll save me,
From the petrichor of a serene winter rain.
7
0
904
Paper Boats
Last August's rainfall, had hardly wet the arid land,
Before I saw little paper boats in a narrow runlet.
Some queer perception of raindrops,
From under a blanketed woodstand,
Tells, there were no hailstorms; not even rainbow bands.
Our paper boats fluttered in cross alignments,
Towards the steep bed they flew,
And across some huge oak, they collapsed and 'still' they stood.
That reminds me of long gone childhood,
Folding old papers into new boats,
As they went through all obstacles, and sailed over the rainfalls.
3
0
638
A Friend of Mine
If you were a friend of mine,
I would collide the clouds for you, and bring you rain;
I'll bring the stars for you, as I'm insane,
I'll do everything for you, only if you tell me you're a friend of mine...
I'll raise oceans for you, and bring you land,
I'll shelter home for you, in no time,
If you were a friend of mine.
I'll call you mine, and I'll be yours...
I can tease you to hell, and love you the most,
If that time ever comes across, I'd like to be a friend of yours...
I know not how to make friends, but know how to treat them,
So if you be a friend of mine, I'll forever stay yours...
5
0
621
All Around You
Love is all around you,
Don't go out and look for it.
Why to look for love in just one person?
When it lies all around you.
In the sky, in clouds, in all nature,
It is like music, well pronounced...
When in dull times like those,
When you think who would love you the most?
Relive old memories, and you'll come across,
Those people you see every day,
Who make your life speacial in little ways,
If the little things they do or say,
Isn't enough for you today,
Then I don't know what love is to you,
What else could the definition of love be?
All I see, are various possibilities,
If we rethink now, of what love could be -
"Love is all around you, you only have to see it,
And it will surround you..."
And in other times too,
When no one stays around you,
Appreciate what life is, and how it had been,
A little rough, sometimes tough, but still beautiful moments were seen,
Where you belonged to you, and all the world would give,
A sense of love to you, a love that lies all around you,
You'll feel it, you can live it, if for some moments you get your love too...
7
1
654
Rough Time
Tick-tock-tick! There's a roughness in time,
The master he think of himself, he isn't,
Seconds into milliseconds into nanoseconds into a paradox!
Tick-tock-tick, 'TIME' - a paradox!
Rough it was? Was it not?
Time sweeps, time doesn't wait, but time as it is, it's handmade...
Tick-tock-tick, TIME is handmade!
We make it, we break it, we can come above it all,
He ain't constant, he may fly away,
Tick-tock-tick, TIME flies away!
There's a roughness in Time: "You can make it your own!"
And as time is rough, you can create small pauses...
Tick-tock-tock, TIME frozes...
5
1
625
Believe
Give me equal opportunities,
Treat me with equal rights,
Judge me for my unique talents,
Don't listen to those stereotypes.
And don't ask me what my gender is,
It should hardly matter much;
For I stand here, for equal rights,
And you can't put me aside,
You can't tell me, what I have to do, or what I don't have to do.
I know what I can be! And so will I become,
A cricketer, a pilot, or who knows, a nurse.
You can't hold me, I don't give you that authority,
For as long as I believe in me, no one can stop me!
7
0
566
Paramour
My deadly heart is a beautiful dream,
My gobbly heart - a supreme.
My love ain't written in easy spells,
My body ain't no feathered bed.
My fierce soul is a little oblivion,
To fantasy and to reality.
To the moon and back,
I can love you still.
My heart ain't no heaven nor hell,
Every day has its story to tell.
4
0
616
Love's Art
On a canvas, I paint my love,
Brushes in hands, over canvas I spill colors,
But they paint differently now, have you seen them fall?
And as they fell, each stroke got right,
And the painting was complete in a moment's time,
It's always the same, the same person,
It's always you, you silly one...
You've taken my brushes, they stroke so differently!
Will you paint some love? I'm waiting patiently,
I know not that, you'll paint a different painting,
A person I don't know, your love maybe…
I can't make a different one; as I try
It turns out to be, just the same person,
I'm happy, I'm sad, I'm in love perhaps.
Love that I gave, painting that I made,
You know not of it; I can only imagine,
What if my drawings are disclosed to you;
Lost love would scribble in my head,
I'm waiting maybe, for the paper to tear,
In pieces it's left, just like broken crayons,
I don't know why, why it has the same colours….
5
2
994
Folly
I've found my folly!
No not I'm not jolly,
It's true that such things exist,
For I've been counting down and just for a gist-
One was when they deteriorated - my rising grades fell low,
I stood by me, got myself up, studied right back, all ready for the show.
One was when I felt alone; "A friend" I pleaded,
But I stood by me, all the time, that's how I succeeded.
One when I fell, I fell so hard in love,
But in a matter of time, I realized, it was all just mud.
One happened when I got a surgery,
Faced fear right in the eye, such a misery.
Shouted and screamed all this time, with nobody by my side,
But I stood by me, I got my back, I'm always here for the ride!
2
0
852
Let Love
Let pure love be alive,
Let it enter hearts, and then let it thrive;
Let it be obscured from all those fancy furnishings,
Let it have limits, but let it fly with its broken wings.
Let not melancholies fade it away,
Let not it be fake, as to end by the 'light of the day';
Let it stay forever until dusk till dawn remains,
Let it be for one, as for one it gains.
Let it be crystal clear, like that sun in monsoon's rain,
Let it take away hateness as well as the pain,
Let time's art change it not,
Let it exist in its purest form.
3
0
826
Today
Today comprises gone Yesterdays, and those unknown Tomorrows,
It's made of happiness, just like those sad sorrows :
"Yesterday, had passed away, without a single word left to say,
Why then it comes back, yet again, just so much alive in Today?
Tomorrow, is yet to come, just like a mysterical fun,
Why then its miseries, that now occur, had already foreshadowed Today?
Today, the creator of all arts, but timely goes away so fast,
Why does it show then, itself to be, the above and the vast?"
…Today, I stumble, on debris of Yesterday's Plunder, And the upcoming Tomorrow's Thunder;
But Today, is that day, which I know I'm going to seize,
So that Today, as it would be, becomes 'my new found peace.'
5
0
983
It's 'You'
There's something I would like to say,
To see you smile every single day,
That's all that I ever pray;
There's something indescribable by art,
You're the one - 'closest to my heart',
You're all that I ever need,
And this is all that I never say;
There's some time that is left with me,
And I hope I can pass it with you,
For all that will become of me, I don't know,
But as long as I'm with you, I know 'I'm home.'
9
0
1482
Own It
You're the master of your own destiny,
The maker and breaker of your own symphony,
All you got is what all you have,
Three steps forth, then two steps back,
Doing mistakes, keep learning along the way,
Feel yourself, don't think what they'll say,
Live the way you want to live,
Spare all the hardships, and learn to forgive.
31
3
2886
A Girl's 'Love'
My heart beats are deafened by the silence you gave them,
I loved you for so long, is this how you treat me?
I know that you know that my love for you was real,
And I know that it's true, you don't feel how I feel,
I loved you like you will always be my destiny,
I can't love someone else like this, I'm trapped in melancholy,
My every breath has a song in your name,
I can't live without this, it's not like a game,
You don't have to love me too, but atleast don't reject me,
My love for you was pure, and it will, forever be,
And in your love, I have learned to live these days,
For all the time that remains, you will forever be my 'always',
5
2
974
In The Wait
Yes, there's someone meant for you,
Someone who will give love to you.
Yes, there will be a lot like them,
The ones you'll meet, maybe one of them.
But in the wait, you can't forget to live,
For people you love, you will have to live.
Chase your life, dream for a while, you're also important,
Don't think, "What's worth all this, what's important?"
You'll realize, you were losing in the wait,
Forget about it, dream, chase, but don't wait.
Follow your heart, live your life,
And if destiny wants, someone will come in your life,
But in the wait, don't lose yourself,
You're better off without anyone, learn to make happiness yourself.
3
0
968
Promise
Oh, will you be friends with me?
A certain stranger, comprehends to me...
That's how it happens, isn't it?
A promise kept for the sake of it.
Oh, I think I'm beginning to love you...
What do I suppose, can it be true?
That's how it goes, and in confusion,
I trust, I forgive, I believe, it'll be fun.
Oh, I like this person, I need to tell you this,
"Why me? What happened? What is this!"
That's what you said to me, when I fell,
The promises you kept, all shattered in hell.
And in keeping promises, here we are again,
You may think it differently, but it's still the same,
"Oh, can we still be friends again?"
And this goes on, without any blame...
6
2
1167
Unspoken Feelings
Do you think he's still going to love you,
With all your broken heart?
Do you inject in him your poetry,
While he just gives you scars?
Do you think it's passion - a longed desire?
He's in water, and you're burning fire.
The desires of tastes will rot in hell,
But I'll always smile, and say I'm well!
My sunken poetry becomes my deep self,
While his scars pain, he just dwells.
I don't think he's still in love with me,
His deep desires, has set me free.
2
0
844
The Liberal Voice
I feel like I have a lot to say,
Still running out of words,
I feel like I want to talk to someone,
Still don't know what to say,
I feel like I'm drowning in a sea,
Still I'm alive, still breathing...
I don't have words, but words have me,
We're in a sea, a sunken melody,
Is being heard in a faraway land,
So I see, myself, I'm happy...
I'm alive.
I don't know where this ends,
I don't ought to know,
It goes on forever,
Me and myself, we're together,
In this sea, where no one talks to me,
Where I don't talk to no one,
Where I long for a conversation,
But the conversation don't long for me...
4
0
1066
Smoke
Like a tyranny it flews,
Deep in human lungs,
With its sinned self,
A cigarette's smoke.
It burns, but human inhales,
The fading pleasure,
The faking pleasure,
Of a cigarette's smoke.
Can the time be turned?
Lungs are burnt,
In need of help,
Inhaling a cigarette's smoke.
When death be turned,
Time has come,
The cancerious self,
Kills a cigarette's smoke.
5
0
979
A Rainy Day
Water, from above, was singing musical notes,
But if only u listen.
Water, when it fell, formed childish bubbles,
But if only you see.
Water, in the soil, created calm petrichor,
But if only you smell.
Water, in the clouds, fell from open taps,
But if only you imagine,
Water, when it touched you, refreshed your soul,
But if only you feel.
Water, when it rained, made your day beautiful,
But if only you believe.
Because...
Rain, I believe, is a miracle that I see,
Rain, that I felt, succoured my sunken self,
Rain, when it happened, gave thoughts just for me.
Rain, in the mud, gave a smell that I need,
Rain, from the clouds, made noises that I crave,
Rain, when it rains, is a rhythm very deep.
6
0
776
The White Room
In the White Room I walk alone,
Stairs lead me above,
The Room is neat and clean,
Without any sense of life in it.
I walk alone to the top,
And it's the top where I remain.
But the stairs go on,
No matter how many steps I make.
The White Room has glass in it,
A certain Royal class in it;
I'd seen the steps I'd made,
And I can't go back now.
It's only above, what there is,
And till the time remains, I feel I'm stuck,
It's like a game never won,
But I'll continue, I must.
In the White room I walk alone,
Where stairs lead me no where;
We are living like this,
If you only realize - "One day is just one step."
6
2
863
A Piece of You
A piece of you was left with me,
I stayed alive for so long,
It was you, who loved me, when everybody else had left me,
You felt me, you held me, you showed those miracles I couldn't believe,
You and I were meant to be,
I knew we were just meant to be,
My piece in you, yours in mine,
When our hands were held so tight, I knew this was right,
We were together, side by side,
Tell me, if I was alive,
Will all of you be all of mine?
Tell me if this is right, my hand in yours and yours in mine?
We can walk alone till the end of time,
I'll be waiting forever, at the other side.
16
4
1412
A Sea Poem
People go, people come
Feelings go, feelings come
It's never forever, and it's never final
It's never too late - to begin again,
Even the ends are a very good start.
People like, people don't like,
People change, they just do,
You change, you change too,
Change is must.
Life is must, you shall continue.
Life is like a ship, sail away for a while,
People go, people come,
No one is there to stay.
Life must continue.
You can be wrecked by the infinite blue,
You can get blurred by haze,
Or you can discover a island new,
You can cry over wreck, or begin anew,
Start fresh, at the sunset.
When no one wants you.
And your life may seem like a dead fish,
And you need water's bliss,
But stay low, the tide isn't over yet,
Emotions that fill you, can be handled too,
No ship shall sail, to reach a destination,
Ships should enjoy the journey,
Journey from life till we die.
Because people go, people come,
And nothing is certain.
But a ship must believe, what there is -
Lot of treasure out there to see.
And this doesn't comprise of materialistic things
Like feelings, and wealth, and happiness,
Because these things come and go... Live a life for all there is,
To seek, to make, to plunder.
You can waste time in olden thoughts,
Or begin new thoughts for new time,
Life may be a dead fish, but you shall learn to survive.
You shall learn, sea is a school,
Even if afterlife exists or not,
U shall learn and use your knowledge,
Nothing is certain,
Things go, things come,
People go, people come.
4
1
987
Cripple Love
Show me love and I cripple,
Love me, and I fall,
Not for you, but for loving,
Tell me anything but that you want me,
Telling that, you make me want you,
You made me cripple,
I'm dead.
I was a complete piece, till your incompleteness staggered me,
At the back and now I'm withered,
I died everytime from inside,
I crave for freedom beside,
It is not love, it's paper,
And it had made me cripple...
Over and over again,
This time badly, I'm so dead, sadly...
I'm lost, don't tell me it's love.
I have had enough!
6
0
1051
Broken
I didn't need you, when I saw you,
But I saw in you such a sadness,
My wings flew to you, towards the ground, where your broken wings did lie,
I let you in my life, I only showed its beautiful sides.
I saw you so sad, that I got sad too,
I thought you'll need me, but I was wrong,
And I just wanted to help, as I knew I could.
I fell for you, but you didn't, I got sad too...
Now, we're both broken, still fixing each other,
And now you're happy, but I'm still sad...
You left me on the ground, you're so bad...
Will you return back and pick me up?
From your "oh so happy world"??
Or will I be lying here, with my broken wings, for some angel to come?
You're gone, and I'm still crying,
You were broken? You've been lying!!
I maybe wrong, but you weren't right too...
So tell me!! What I'm supposed to do?
Be broken, or be loon??
You didn't see in me, what I saw in you, and now I'll be broken soon...
3
0
718
Resonance
You won't believe me if I tell you,
My mind was perplexed indeed,
When he said that day, with so much love,
My cheeks blushed red, don't tease...
So it started like this, our likely conversation yesterday,
I said teasingly as I was dying to talk, "You must be busy, I maybe 'interfering' "
But most unexpectedly he replied,
"You are the interference in my life that caused resonance in me"
Isn't it enough to make me cry??
I said I'll tell you, you won't believe me,
He's the song that keeps me alive...
3
1
627
My Sister
I know you my sister,
Better than anyone else;
The days we spent together,
Were the best.
I miss our fights,
Especially, the ones intentional...
I wanted to be just like you!
But that was unconventional.
As the days pass by,
I hope to see you again,
So that I can fight with you once again,
To tell you - "I love you,"once again.
3
2
606
Half of Me
Half of me is lost, half of me is still finding myself,
I'm skipping daily talks,
The gossips and voices,
Have left nothing, but choices,
I'm surrendering under my own will,
I love solitude more than food,
My nightmares have left me thoughtful,
Dragged me like an autumn leaf,
I'm withered, are you listening?
It's pain, but I'm starting to love misery,
Half of me is still lost, half of me is still searching,
But All of me writes poems, including this new serenity.
4
2
748
You Don't Know...
You are the heart to my soul,
The flames to my fire,
And the song that keeps me alive,
If there ever was, a chance worth it,
I'll give you all my life; you don't know it...
My love silently craves for you,
You don't understand, how much it needs you,
But my mind still calls me a liar!
Is it love or is it desire?
4
0
720
Bare Naked Soul
You've seen your bare naked soul,
You know your triggered blood weaknesses,
You've hid thy soul underneath thy carpet,
For the world is but made this way,
They'll only see your uphold gentleness,
Deep within, is your soul that cries,
Loud enough, to feed itself on you...
And when it comes to find you,
You hide in darkness, though still shattered,
Understanding life, so purposefully,
But on dark nights, when you're gone,
Your bare naked soul demands in hunger,
And then it's your gentleness that sweeps...
3
0
674
Love... Again?
When you have fallen in love once,
With every breath that your heart cried,
Can you fall in love again?
Just with the same feelings, the same desires.
But no, hold on, you'll make better love,
After all these tears that have gone by,
Taught you to be more fierce and how you were to love yourself,
Before you give it to anyone else!
The heart that cried accepts it isn't easy,
To find someone you're looking for,
And promises a better love.
So when you love again, because if you do, it'll be in its purest form...
7
0
828
Depressed
Walking down the aisle,
Back to the street, crowd and voices,
We're all a bit depressed,
Kind of sad, need some rest,
But we're not alone under moon,
So we hope we aren't loon,
Because our voices weren't our own,
As our screams have never shown,
The pain our mind withholds,
And the battles we daily won.
4
0
788
Angels, Demons
To become stronger, you only need pain,
Injuries, and drops of rain;
They'll shun your darkness, in the light of the day,
They'll show you yourself; you'll be ashamed,
Don't worry, we're all in the Same.
There are angels and demons, which can't be tamed!
But there's a secret, lying in here,
They don't know us, we're all set and clear -
We know who we are but we're not ashamed,
They've shown us the sadness, they have made us a game
To play which, they're the two players,
Angels and demons have been tricking are heads,
Till we toppled and squared ourselves, into our shelves,
But at the same time, let me be clear,
We need them the most, without them we won't be here,
So we're all, both good and bad,
And we swear, to maintain the balance today
For we remember, with-what feathers we were flying yesterday,
Coloring the skies with our broken crayons,
Remember? How the nasty time flew away,
Leaving us to deal with our thoughts along the way,
We came out as spirited angels by the way,
And became demons to hold us to ground;
The Equilibrium learnt to balance itself,
He lived in the rainbows, he lived in the rains.
5
3
1020
The End
It happened like the way it has to be,
Every tear that fell left you stronger gradually,
Now here comes a different day,
Smiling with a rainbow that had cried in the rain,
And the stars shine brighter now,
Proving us surprisingly wrong,
As we thought it would be a matter of pain,
But it comes out to be just a little chapter's obvious 'The End'.
3
1
957
Mad
Everyone has become, their own kind of mad,
Little bit of magic was all we ever wanted,
But Life showed up, a myriad of other choices,
Now, all we have left with, is our own madness.
But we are glad we found it, to remove our little sadness!
7
0
1201
Makes Me Crazy
Under the light of a thousand stars,
When nights were dark and hazy,
Exchange of letters as the day ends,
Just a little 'good night',
In some million different ways,
The stars, as you may not believe,
Twinkled so magically,
And that's what makes me crazy.
7
0
938
Dreams
Mind is occupied by thoughts,
Stories and scenes all roam,
Haunted by my own ghost,
Still have courage to fly across,
To the sky; I can control;
I know; faith this time;
No boundary lines.
I'll let the ocean sweep past bay;
Another life in bottle floats away,
I'll clean up, let go of some space,
For my dreams that I have to chase!
4
0
1327